2020.10.26 21:06 incorruptible_bk Local secret sex video
| This post will be used to aggregate news from the sentencing of Keith Raniere. I'll try to highlight the longtime beat reporters and voices of survivors.|
Given the possibility of crowding at the EDNY complex and COVID-19 rules, I will not attempt to enter the building to try to observe like with the Bronfman sentencing. I may check what goes on with the press gaggle outdoors and see if survivors wish to leave their statements.
If you find interesting Tweets or articles, please suggest them in the comments and I'll put them in the post with a shoutout.
Raniere Sentencing Day -1 (10/26/2020) Clips 7:35AM, NY Daily News "NXIVM sex cult leader Keith Raniere denied new trial, rants about justice" by Noah Goldberg
Judge Nicholas Garaufis ruled that Raniere’s motion for a new trial was filed too late, and that “even if Mr. Raniere’s motion were timely, it would fail on other grounds” — adding that affidavits from two devoted followers “is neither material nor exculpatory.”10:00AM New York Times: "Sex Cult Leader, Facing Life Sentence, Regrets Nothing" by Nicole Hong
Several victims are expected to testify when Keith Raniere, the founder of Nxivm, is sentenced this week for sex trafficking, extortion and other crimes.11:29AM Vice "NXIVM Survivor India Oxenberg on Why She Didn't Believe She Was Brainwashed" by Sarah Berman
The 29-year-old victim of a notorious slavery-themed blackmail scheme will deliver a statement at Raniere’s sentencing in Brooklyn federal court Tuesday, but Oxenberg says she won’t address the convicted sex trafficker directly. “He doesn’t have the ability to feel remorse or empathy, so it’s more about me communicating the facts,” she said in an interview with VICE News. “I’m addressing the judge.”2:30PM Ayla Ferrone tweets:
Excited to partner with @GiulianaBrunoTV and @WTEN for coverage on the sentencing of #NXIVM leader Keith Raniere tomorrow.2:30PM NYT: "A Timeline of the Nxivm Sex Cult Case" by Carla Correa
3:00PM Jaclyn Angro tweets:
"Supporters of Keith Raniere from Make Justice Blind are having a press conference outside Federal Court in Brooklyn."4:00PM ABC News: "NXIVM founder Keith Raniere to face sentencing" by Aaron Katersky
Keith Raniere returns to Brooklyn federal court on Tuesday to learn his sentence for running NXIVM, a self-help organization prosecutors labeled a "criminal enterprise" exploited by Raniere for power, profit and sex.4:51PM New York Post: "Nxivm sex-cult sicko Keith Raniere set to speak at his sentencing tomorrow" by Rebecca Rosenberg & Kate Sheehy
The convict’s lawyer, Marc Agnifilo, told The Post on Monday, “He has the constitutional right to speak to the judge, and I expect that he will do so.’’Raniere Sentencing Day (10/27/2020) Clips 1:21AM Our subreddit's own u/yescruz takes a late night photo of the MDC and says "i wonder if KR’s getting any sleep tonight!"
[Ed Note: here are some statements from survivors of the cult who have come forward. Many other victims are anonymous Jane/John Does or use only their first names. Please keep that in mind]
2:02AM Susan Dones tweets:
Having a hard time sleeping, but really need it, long week Flew into NYC today to speak at #KeithRaniere sentencing I know a lot of ExNx can't or don't want to be at this historic event. Know I stand strong & carry you all in my heart as speak to the 😈 man What's that? LIFE....5:39AM Mark Vicente tweets
Today prisoner 57005-177 will be sentenced. For us recent whistleblowers, this has been over three years in the making. For those who came before us, DECADES. We stand on the shoulders of many brave women who tried so hard to warn everyone. Thank you!7:32AM Ivy Nevares: "My victim impact statement addendum on Keith Raniere"
Raniere stole nearly 17 years of my life and labor. He took credit for the work I did and the skills I built during his nearly 11-year absence in our relationship, as he shunned me for an “ethical breach” I supposedly committed against him. Initially, the “breach” was raising questions about Raniere’s conduct and promiscuity, then it morphed into my gaining weight, then it became something no one could define. A solution is impossible if a problem cannot be defined. Through these imaginary infractions, Raniere directed most of the community to shun me, making me a pariah until I figured out the impossible task of remedying the “breach.”[Ed note: Here are a couple messages from the Albany press corps, some of whom hit the road early to get to the courthouse. Show some love to the Capital Region reporters who had to do a lot of travel to cover both the story and the local reaction from the Clifton Park area.]
5:00AM Democrat & Chronicle**: "NXIVM founder Keith Raniere faces possible life sentence Tuesday" by** Jon Campbell
Raniere, who spent much of his youth in Suffern, Rockland County, continues to have a series of devoted followers, including many who wrote letters to Garaufis in support of him.5:56AM Giuliana Bruno of WTEN tweets from the road:
On the road dark and early this morning. Headed from Albany to Brooklyn for Keith Raniere’s sentencing. I know a lot of you will be interested in this, so I’ll start a thread of some background & recent developments to get you ready for the day. @WTEN6:47AM Jaclyn Cangro of Spectrum News Albany tweets from Brooklyn:
Good morning from Brooklyn.7:01AM Albany Times-Union: "NXIVM founder Keith Raniere faces sentencing Tuesday" by Robert Gavin
At least eight victims are expected to deliver statements to the judge, including a Mexican woman, now 30, whom Raniere began a sexual relationship with when she was 15. In November 2005, Raniere took photos of the girl, which led to his conviction of a racketeering act of possessing child pornography.[Ed Note: Here's coverage from national-level media]
CourtTV (on YouTube today): NXIVM 'sex cult' leader Keith Raniere learns his fate
?:??AM Associated Press: "Long prison stint looms for defiant self-help guru" by Tom Hays & Larry Neumeister
6:39AM CNN: "Nxivm founder could be sentenced to life today. A teen victim's father and others are lined up in his defense" by Sonia Moghe
Jurors heard testimony about Raniere grooming the girl, whom CNN is not naming, and having sex with her. Her sister, who was identified only as Daniela during the trial, testified that after she found out Raniere was having sex with her sister, he told her, "... there were some women -- girls -- that were more emotionally mature than others."6:56AM CBS News tweets
The mastermind of the so-called cult #NXIVM Keith Raniere will be sentenced for his crimes today, which include sex-trafficking. Ahead on @CBSThisMorning, @NikkiBattiste speaks to one victim about what she hopes will come out of Raniere's sentencing.[Ed Note: remaining items will be sorted by time, regardless of source]
7:35AM Jaclyn Cangro tweets
People are already lining up outside of court. Many are members of the #NXIVM Five/@BlindfoldHer. Some are part of various film and documentary crews. When I spoke to the court yesterday, they said they wouldn’t be letting people in early (due to COVID).8:27AM Giuliana Bruno tweets video from the scene, and the line has lengthened (there are other -proceedings today so it may not all be Raniere related)
I’ll be live outside Federal Court in Brooklyn in about 5 mins. Keith #Raniere, leader of NXIVM, scheduled to be sentenced at 11 AM. @WTEN8:43AM Jaclyn Cangro tweets
Some of Raniere’s supporters were at his trial, but they were pretty quiet. In recent months, they’ve been showing more support for the #NXIVM leader. It’ll be interesting to see any interactions between people who have left NXIVM and those who still support him.8:46AM Spanish-language author Juan Vázquez tweets (w. machine translation below)
Ya afuera de la corte @EDNYnews donde hay una fila de gente esperando ingresar a la sentencia de #KeithRaniere líder de la empresa #NXIVM. En algunas horas más información.9:06AM J.T. Fetch tweets:
#NXIVM: Good morning from outside Brooklyn Federal court. Waiting in line to head inside for #KeithRaniere's sentencing at 11am. Social distancing is in effect & masks are being worn due to #COVID19. @CBS6Albany9:26AM Fetch tweets:
#NXIVM just saw Paul DerOhannesian, one of #KeithRaniere's defense attorneys entering the courthouse @CBS6Albany9:38AM Juan Vázquez tweets (w. machine translation below)
Llegada de la grandiosa Barbara Bouchey a la corte. Su historia a detalle en mi libro *#*NXIVM la Secta que Sedujo al poder en México, publicado por @megustaleermex @TheVowHBO #Raniere #Sentencia[Ed note: it's close to the 11AM start-time. I am sticking to aggregating coverage from Twitter and other sources, which will only be sporadic during the actual proceeding due to a blanket ban on devices in the courthouse. I would expect a recess to be called in the mid-late afternoon at which point there will be an update as to who has spoken.]
11:11AM Ryan Parker (of The Hollywood Reporter) tweets:
Wow. Per Keith Raniere sentencing: "Two overflow courtrooms and the cafeteria are full and public/media are not being allowed into the courthouse at this point," court official says.11:16AM, ibid
They may open yet another courtroom for overflow, official says.11:54AM Ayla Ferrone tweets (away from the courthouse):
Getting some intel on who will give victim impact statements today. Spoke with @ToniNatalie1017 this morning who is there in person, @catoxenberg says her daughter India is there in person as well. @sarahjedmondson tells me she sent a video statement. #NXIVM @WTEN12:05PM Reuters: "NXIVM leader Keith Raniere faces possible life in prison at sentencing hearing in New York" by Brandon Pierson
12:15PM Frank Parlato's blog (you know how to search for it) states that Camila has spoken. Awaiting corroboration elsewhere.
❗1:00PM NY Times: "Victim Describes Abuse by Keith Raniere, Leader of Nxivm Sex Cult" by Nicole Hong ❗
Her voice trembling, the witness, identified only as Camila, recalled on Tuesday the precise date that she was sexually abused by Keith Raniere, the leader of a self-improvement company called Nxivm that prosecutors described as a sex cult.❗1:14PM NY Post: "Keith Raniere’s first sex slave breaks her silence about Nxivm’s ‘monster'" By Lorena Mongelli and Kate Sheehy ❗
“He screwed with my mind for so long,’’ said the woman, Camila, during victim-impact statements before Raniere’s sentencing in federal court on charges including sex-trafficking and racketeering.1:26PM Daily Beast: "NXIVM Victims Confront Sex-Cult Leader Keith Raniere: ‘Nothing Noble About Abusing a Child’ by Pilar Melendez
Sarah Edmondson, a former top recruit in NXIVM who was one of the original whistleblowers against the organization, also addressed the court via video. Speaking directly to Raniere, she slammed the cult leader for being a “liar, parasite, and a grifter” who manipulated people seeking personal growth.1:48PM Pilar Melendez tweets
“I will be the victim of Keith Ranieres for the rest of my life—but I don’t need to act like one,” India Oxenberg told the court during #KeithRaniere's sentencing today.[2:25PM Ed Note: There is a recess and several journalists who were inside are recapping. I will post threads below. Apparently all victim-impact statements have been made, and all that remains is for Raniere and/or his lawyers to speak]
Four members of the Mexican family broken by Raniere spoke. Middle daughter confined to a room: “I survived not b/c you were merciful. Because I was resilient” The youngest, who had sex with Raniere at 15: “Survival is instinctive, even in the most extreme circumstances” #NXIVMGiuliana Bruno:
I talked to @bjbouchey while we waited in the security checkpoint heading into court. She said she felt more “at peace” heading into today than she did for Bronfman’s sentencing, adding that her relationship with Keith was “different.”Jaclyn Cangro (h/t u/swissmiss_76**)**
A number of the people who spoke brought up they have thought of suicide. The most emotional person was Kristin Keefe, who has a son with Raniere. “I can never get back the 20 years he’s subjected me to.” She is still trying to work out a child support agreement #NXIVMAyla Ferrone (h/t u/sly_boots)
Just spoke with @GiulianaBrunoTV on her break. She tells me they have wrapped up victim impact statements and are moving on to hear from the prosecution and defense. #NXIVM3:20PM I'm at the EDNY entrance where there's an incredibly large number of news cameras assembled. Frank Parlato is holding his own miniature press conference with a few reporters.
4:05PM Reporters are beginning to take up tactical positions, possibly in anticipation of a sentence announcement.
(Keep in mind that the court usually comes to a halt between 4-5PM, and the local evening news crews (the largest camera contingent) will want to be ready for live shots.)
BREAKING: SENTENCE IS 120 YEARS @EDNYNews: Nxivm founder and leader Keith Raniere sentenced to 120 years in prison. In addition, Raniere has been assessed a $1,750,000 fine, per Pilar Melendez on Twitter
As u/Trisolaran_arbitrage notes, Pilar Melendez (and Jaclyn Cangro) note that terms of Raniere's sentence include no contact with members of NXIVM. I believe this will require a close reading of Judge Garaufis's ruling, as there are possible issues involving the mother of Raniere's child.
Several persons have reported Raniere engaged in some strange incredible double-talk during his address to the judge. Robert Gavin noted the following:
Judge Garaufis has filed his own Sentencing Memorandum. This may clarify how the 120 year sentence was imposed. There are also extracts of victim statements that have not made it into the roundup.
But of particular note, the $1.75 million fine imposed on Raniere will result in a lien placed on the estate of the late Pamela Cafritz, Raniere's girlfriend from whom he is believed to have inherited a substantial sum. Cafritz has been accused of acting as Raniere's madam and co-conspirator, so perhaps some justice is being done beyond the grave here.
Last item: Mr. Raniere in the dock
Here is the courtroom artist's sketch of India Oxenberg giving her testimony about Keith Raniere, who was dressed in his prison jumpsuit. It may be the last depiction of Raniere we get for a while.
submitted by incorruptible_bk to theNXIVMcase [link] [comments]
2020.10.26 17:03 Pristine-Engine4388 Local secret sex video
PART 3 - FINALE. I wasn’t sure if what he had said had really gotten through to my traumatized mind so I jumped in and interrupted.
'MEN?!!? PEOPLE?!' I questioned, not letting him get a response in before going off on a tangent.
'NO, ITS JUST ONE GUY, HE SAID HIS NAME WAS DAVE, HE TRIED TO TAKE ME LAST WEEK AND NOW HE CAME BACK TO FINISH THE JOB! BUT HE TOOK JESS INSTEAD AND ITS ALL MY FAULT. PLEASE YOU HAVE TO FIND HIM AND GET HER BACK! PLEASE!' I started to get frustrated, Time was running out and we didn’t have time to spare.
In all honestly, I felt like I was responsible for not telling my parents about ‘Dave’ in the first place so I was desperate to get Jess home safe.
Agent Johnson held his hand up dismissively to calm my outburst and made sure I was listening before he continued.
'The man you described..’ He sighed, in what felt like a bit of shame.
‘His name isn’t 'Dave' .. His name is Damian Ramsey...’ He took another pause and sighed again as if trying to find the words whilst his gaze was aimed at the floor
‘He is a criminal informant of the bureau'
Our eyes all widened, this was getting more and more bizarre. My mum went ballistic as you can imagine.
Saying that this man tried to force his way into our home last week, to do god only knows what to me and now we find out he works for the FBI!
She was appalled and outraged but my father managed to settle her down. He, as well as everyone else,wanted to know more.
The agent waited for the room to settle again before he continued.
'He was originally a part of the gang we are investigating. They are known as 'The Swarm'.
I couldn’t help but think back to the butterfly symbol when he said their name. A knot tightened in my gut.
‘They are a ruthless clandestine network of human traffickers who are responsible for a large percentage of violent crime all over the country. Kidnappings, Child Abductions, Murders, Torture, Extortion, Blackmail.. you name it.'
He sighed once again and took on a defeated look the more he delved in on the subject.
‘They have kidnapped over 700 people some as young as 18 month, and that is just what we know of. The victims mainly are traded, for large amounts of money, to some of the sickest people on the planet.
The ones who cant be sold are often traded into prostitution or modern day slavery. In some of the more high profile cases, They have slaughtered entire families if their target couldn’t be taken quietly, unlike Jessica was this evening.’
I, along with everyone else, listened with pure disgust. I really thought it was bad Jessica being taken by this Ramsey character. But oh my god, this was becoming so much worse.
The agent spoke again.
‘These monsters don’t stop there. Some people are taken and are made into torture or snuff videos to be sold on the black market.’
‘or if its a kid from a rich family they even use these horrific methods to extort ransom money from the victims family.’
Jessica’s mum gasped and a little more of her soul left her body as her imagination tortured her already fragile mind.
'So what was this Ramsey character doing trying to assault my daughter if he’s a government asset!' my mum blurted out in a rage.
'Ramsey was what we call a 'spotter' for The Swarm. He would identify and stalk potential targets that seemed lucrative. ya know the types? Home-aloners, Tear-aways, Run-aways.’
‘These people would be trafficked and he also knew of people who scout for Rich Families to extort and blackmail by threatening their loved ones.’
‘Ramsey himself, was mainly part of the trafficking side of the operation. He told us the Gang would scout kids they could potentially take before obtaining photographs to advertise the target on the black market and secret online forums. If these adverts met a Buyers specific 'tastes'...’
The way he said that made the parents in the room recoil with nausea.
‘...Then the buyer would then offer to pay an obscene amount of money to the gang on delivery of the Target.’
‘And believe me it gets worse...with Ramsey’s information, we have discovered that these buyers aren’t what or who you’d think they’d be.’
He bit his bottom lip and clasped his hands together as if anticipating the impact of what he was going to say next.
‘They aren’t mentally disturbed sex offenders. Most of the time the Buyers are god damn CEOs, Judges, Senators, Politicians.. Jesus we even have some circumstantial evidence some high ranking cops are involved.’
‘We believe this organised group have direct links to some of the countries most rich and powerful elite. This is why this investigation is top secret and any links to it, at all, have to be kept internal. We have assets in the field who we need to keep safe.’
We couldn’t believe how dark this was turning. I could tell everyone was having a hard time grasping the reality of it all.
'Most of the members of the group tend to be extremely violent and all of the high ranking ones have a lot of sociopathic tendencies but ultimately together they are a well organised unit, who will do anything to further there interests.’
‘However, Ramsey.. well.. he was different. He didn’t care about the money or the power. That sick bastard had a 'taste' for the young ones himself. He often used his line of work to ‘satisfy’ his twisted needs. This eventually got him in some personal trouble with the law. He was arrested on suspicion of the rape and murder of a 5 year old boy in Atlanta a few years back.’
‘Oh boy, We had DNA evidence, Damning CCTV footage. We had that bastard dead to rights, literally. Georgia has the death penalty'. He said this like a soccer player who had just missed a last minute penalty.
Agent Johnson contempt for the man started to show as he continued with the story.
'It almost like the guy didn’t give a shit if he was caught! He wasn’t at all careful!
We were literally about the charge him when he got this-this smug look on his face. That stupid face of his! He turned and says to me with this real superficial arrogance, that made me want to snap his neck right then and then..’
I knew the tone of voice he was talking about. So assured. Like he was invincible.
Agent Johnson did his best to replicate Ramsey’s broad Georgia accent. 'Now you just what a cotton picking minute their agent, Now what if I could give you the biggest win of your pathetic career? Who cares about one little toddler who lets face it, was begging for what he got anyway? I could make you the biggest cat in the alley Agent Johnson'
When Johnson finished, he almost took on the look of Jessica’s mum. He looked defeated. He'd sold out this little boy who suffered horribly at the hands of this animal for nothing but for a few cheap wins. A few bad apples had faced charges but the tree so to speak was still standing. The Swarm were still out there. Ruining peoples lives.
'We agreed to drop the charges in regards to the child, in return for his co-operation and information that aided our ongoing investigation into this organised crime syndicate.’
‘In our defence, he gave a lot of information on the gangs methods. Sites they used on the deep web, places they would trade their 'livestock' as he called them, high profile buyers etc.
We are a lot more aware of there presence than we were 3 years ago. We were able to solve a lot of cold cases thanks to his insights. He knew dates, places, people, numbers, sites, accomplices... he was a god damn gold mine and 100% untouchable and the son of a bitch knew it! He never told us everything. He always held stuff back as insurance for him against future convictions.’
His gaze met mine when he said that last sentence. I now understood why he was so bold with me that day. He never once looked as if being caught bothered him.
‘Ramsey went on to secure a WITSEC agreement and we moved him to this area, safe house, immunity, new identity, the works. But we've come to learn tonight that when it comes to the people who we are dealing with here - There ain’t no such thing as Immunity.'
At the time, I wasn’t sure what that last comment meant but the agent continued before I could ask what he was talking about.
'We've had multiple reports on his behaviour since he became a CI. Just minor stuff up until today. Public Indecency, Assault, Drug Charges etc. However, any police reports or enquiries on him automatically set off a federal trip wire and the files become immediately encrypted to anyone except the bureau. This is to protect his identity and our investigation.’
Agent Rodriquez piped up for the first time, rising from his seat at our dining room table with a blue folder in his hand, stamped ‘CLASSIFIED’ in contrasting blood red ink.
'We first became aware of tonights events earlier today. A police report that was filed by a neighbour on the adjacent street.
He reported a man matching Ramsey’s description being dragged into the side door of white ford transit earlier today by two men dressed in all black. With, what he described as ‘creepy ass’ Easter Bunny masks.'
Agent Rodriguez backed up the FBIs theory by pulling out a photo from the blue file to show the adults in the room.
Greg, after receiving a non verbal que from Johnson, distracted me when this was happening by asking me for help with his Iphone. I knew it was some bullshit made up issue but I helped him anyway. I knew now, that whatever was being shown was bad.
The image whatever it was, made Jessica’s mum gasp. Burying her face into her husbands embrace. She broke once again into a sobbing shriek.
After placing the photo away and closing the folder, he continued giving the account of the neighbours police report on Ramseys kidnapping.
'He said the van had been lingering in the area with the engine running and the neighbour thought it looked suspicious as he'd seen the van had kept showing up in the area over the past week but no one ever got in or out and there was no roadworks going on in the area at the time to explain it.’
‘We believe Karma...and The Swarm, finally caught up with Ramsey. We’re not sure if they came here to find Ramsey and found Olivia, or if they came to take Olivia and caught Ramsey. Either way he belongs to them now. I’d have sympathy for the guy but maybe now that kid in Atlanta finally has some Justice.'
Rodriquez already realised that last comment likely wouldn’t go down well with Jessica’s parents and I noticed he was deliberately maintaining eye contact with Agent Johnson and agent Johnson alone. He realised he had just planted a pretty nasty seed in their already fractured minds about the fate of people who are taken by these people.
Oh and Incase you are wondering. I asked my mum about the photograph. My mum told me a few days after this event that the photo was a screenshot from a video found on a memory stick, that was delivered to a wealthy families home two years ago.
It had been taken into evidence during a high profile kidnapping of two young kids.
The image sounded horrifying.
It showed two terrified 6 year olds, sat on a couch with black tape across their mouths.
In between the two kids sat a man in all black clothes with his arms around the two boys in a non threatening way. She said it would be just like my father would put his arms me and my mum in our family photos. But the man wore a mask.
A Pink Easter Bunny mask.
The ears pointed straight up and flopped over just before the top. Totally Regular But it was the the eyes. They were made to look pure evil. They were the type of eyes that drain all sense of safety away from you when you look into them.
A threatening, horrifying glare, that my mum said she still sees from the shadows of her bedroom when she tries to sleep at night. In front of the couch was a table. On the table there was an array of tools.
Screwdrivers, Drills, Scalpels, Plyers, Bolt-cutters.
My mum continued to go into gut wrenching detail about the wounds the kids had before I asked her to stop and she gladfully obliged.
Once again, we hugged and said we loved each. We seem to do that a lot these days.
Agent Johnson continued his story but I noticed Agent Rodriguez received a call that he'd clearly been waiting for. He answered it with haste and left the room to speak.
I had a question. ‘When Da- I mean Ramsey, When Ramsey was trying to get me into my house. He got spooked by a drawing on our drive. I saw you two looking at it earlier. What is it?’ I asked.
Agent Johnson closed his eyes and nodded his head as if to signal he was just about to explain that before I interrupted him.
'The symbol at the bottom of your drive is the gangs brand marking. The symbol is a butterfly. You see, In the world of child sex trading, it symbolises that a buyer is in to very young girls. With this being the gangs niche we can only assume this is the origin of the symbol. Hence ‘The Swarm’. We tend to find this symbol branded onto the victims bodies a lot.'
'BRANDED? like with a hot iron??' Jessica’s Dad piped up He immediately wished he hadn't because as Agent Johnson reluctantly nodded, Jessica’s mum spirit broke, again.
'Our working hypothesis is that the gang came to town for business or to look for Ramsey.
Whilst here, maybe Olivia caught someones eye.
Walks home alone to an empty house. She looks young for her age. All the stuff that makes these sickos see Dollar Signs.
They would have obtained a photo or video then advertised it on a buyers forum on the hidden web or black market these gangs use. They will have received an offer from a buyer so then they will have begun to arrange the Snatch.
They will have been watching the Matthews house for a few days after to figure out your work schedules and your neighbours shedules etc.
Finding the best time to strike.
When everything is set up and a date is set, this is when they spray the symbol on the drive of the house. This is to signal to the 'snatchers' which is the house of the target.
They use yellow so it can be easily seen in the dark. In rare cases its also to claim the target too. Warn off other interested parties and avoid conflicts of ownership with a rival outfit. I’ll be frank though - Not many guys like to piss off The Swarm.'
I didn’t doubt that for one second.
'We believe the snatchers were there to take Olivia the day when Ramsey was trying to get into your house.
They must have spotted him with you and waited for him to take you inside, Where they could have nailed two birds with one stone.
But, he noticed the symbol and when he fled the scene after realising the gang could be watching, The stupid son of a bitch walked right into their grasp.'
Agent Johnson despite knowing his best source of information into the gang was now likely being branded with 256 degree hot metal and being mutilated with sharp tools by a bunch a psychotic easter bunnies.
He couldn’t help but replicate the expression of satisfaction Rodriguez had displayed earlier when they thought of the horrific things Ramsey was having done to him for betraying The Swarm.
I could tell he really felt better for the boy Ramsey killed in Atlanta. His current situation now gave him a bit of peace. What goes around, truly does come back around.
Agent Rodriguez re-entered the room and blurted 'WERE ON! I'm heading down now, I'll check in soon with a status update. Looks like we don’t need Ramsey after all. We could get these bastards tonight!'
He gave this with a slight head nod full of positivity. I couldn’t help feel my hopes to see Jessica alive again flutter upwards for the first time all night. I looked at the clock.
We had around 15 mins before the deadline to trade me for Jess was up.
'So what happens now, what are you doing to get my Jess back?!?!' Jessica’s mum erupted after pulling herself together.
'Well we've been trying to trace the Cell number the gang called on to try locate Jessica but its taking a little longer than anticipated, However our surveillance team have been in position at the warehouse where the caller told us the switch would go down.
2 minutes ago a white van, matching the description of your statement, pulled up. We are just waiting for the golden approval from our Strategic Firearms Commander to move in and take down the men at the drop.
We need the order in case we need to use lethal force. Rodriguez is on his way down now so If they’ve brought Jessica to the meet, we will have her back home soon I promise you guys!'
I could tell he was trying to convince himself as much as he was anyone else.
Something really didn’t feel right to me.
When me and my mum talked this night over a few days later, she told me she’d had the exact same worry.
This gang have evaded capture for years and sounded as if they have the local police networks potentially in their pocket. There was no way arresting them and getting Jessica back was going to be as simple as they made out.
The silence and tension in the room was killing me, so I asked Agent Johnson a question in private, that I really wished I’d kept to myself.
'What is so special about me Agent? Me and Jessica are always being mistook for the other. People say we are like twins. Why are they so desperate to trade me for her? What’s the difference?' I knew it was a selfish question on the bare face of it but I was genuinely curious at this point.
He looked at my mum for approval to answer honestly. She nodded. 'Yes, the fact you and Jessica look alike meant they grabbed her instead of you in the dark by mistake. They wouldn’t have known she was in the house as you entered through the back garden today according to your initial statement and the Van always watched the front. On the recording the Man said that they presented the buyer with a video of Jess after the mix up but he said she looked too old and was ‘too much on the bigger side’. He wanted you because you looked 'Ripe' and wore the Pigtails well. It had to be you... or no deal.'
That made me feel sick.
My mum shot a look at Agent Johnson to scold him for being a little too honest with the wording of things.
Agent Johnson did his best to pull back his error in judgement by adding that likely if I was the one to go down stairs and they tried to take me then maybe they could have killed Jess to make sure there were no loose ends.
He added that if I was the one to be taken I would be being traded as we speak and there’d be no opportunity to save me like we have with Jessica, right now.
I could tell he wasn’t the best when dealing with younger people so I humoured him and acted as if I was actually seeing the bright side of the situation. I could tell he felt better.
We smiled at each other. I could tell he felt as if he’d done good now with the way he gave me and my mum a friendly wink. I think and still to this day that Agent Johnson was a good man overall.
Our brief lighthearted moment was blown apart by Agent Johnsons Radio Handset Crackling to Life.
'AGENTS DOWN, I REPEAT AGENTS ARE DOWN, STATUS ZERO!, THERE DEAD, THERE ALL DEAD!, I REPEAT STATUS ZERO!'
Everyone in the house, just dropped what they were doing and focused on the harrowing dialogue coming through the device in Agent Johnsons trembling hand. I could tell he was trying to remain calm for our benefit.
'Rodriguez, what is happening ?? where are the targets ?? Where is the girl?!' The 5 seconds of silence felt like hours as we all crowded round awaiting the news.
'Its a god damn massacre Johnson! The van, It was a god damn diversion! There’s 4 bodies here! two in the front seat of the surveillance van and the vehicle is on fire! Its blown to shit!'
He took a moment to cough the smoke out of his lungs before he finished the update.
'The other two are laying face down in the dirt by van tire marks. Oh my god their throats have been slit wide open! Jesus its a god damn blood bath, Bill! Jesus Christ, there’s no pulse!'
Judging by Agent Johnsons facial expressions, He came to a horrific realisation.
'4 bodies?!.. There was a team of 5?! Where’s the fifth man?!?!'
‘Oh god damn! Daniels!!? Agent Daniels, If you’re here make yourself know Agent - THATS AN ORDER!!’
Both agents tones were panicky, desperate and short of breath.
For the first time tonight, I feel the two men truly empathized with what Jessicas parents were feeling.
Now I’m older I have my own theory about what happened to the surveillance team that night outside that warehouse. I imagine the gang had no intentions of making a trade and Jess was never with them. They wanted to lure me to the site under the false sense of security being under FBI escort.
They likely had a unit already in place to take out anyone at the meet and they were planning to take me by force whilst tying up a lot of loose ends at the same time. Agent Johnson did in fact say it would be there sort of MO.
I believe the gang had seen the surveillance team arrive and park up, they then waited. When the time was right , they Drove the van in to the middle of the dirt road outside the warehouse as a Diversion.
I think a group of men armed with weapons lay in wait inside the vehicle. Once the FBI got the golden approval from the SFC, 3 armed agents got out the FBI vehicle and approached the Van with guns drawn.
Maybe at this time another group of Swarm members attacked the Vehicle with a Molatov cocktail or Grenade. The hot explosion, and the sound of their colleagues screaming in agony pulling at their burning skin and clothes, caused the men approaching the van to turn their back on it.
This gave the group in the van a chance to jump out and kill 2 of the 3 Federal agents and Kidnap the other.
I guess we will never know what truly happened but after 5 years of going over it in my head, that’s the most plausible scenario I can think of.
There was maybe an hour or so that passed by since the Incident. Mainly filled by Jessica’s mum screaming at the agents, wailing and shrieking where her little girl was and what they were doing to get her back.
Agent Johnsons superior called him to lose his shit and asked him what on earth possessed two decorated agents to send a team of just 5 people to take down the most dangerous organised crime group in north America.
Johnson attempted to justify his actions by saying too many agents may have got them detected by the gang and cost them their chance of taking them down and saving Jessica.
I would have felt bad for the guy, if not trying to pull my head out of oblivion. The realisation that I am likely never going to see my best friend again was a blow I wasn’t ready for.
When people ask me what the darkest time of my life was. It was this hour. The uncertainty. The waiting.
The time between learning our last hope to get my friend back was gone, and awaiting to hear what had become of a hardworking agent, who was just doing his job. And, of course my best friend who had never done anything other than be nice to everyone she'd ever met.
The anxiety and dread pulled my insides into knots they I never thought could be undone.
And then, our landline phone rang..
The same process as before with the tech guys setting up the recording and listening devices whilst once again attempting to trace the call.
Only this time Agent Johnson picked up the phone.
He wasn’t in the mood for games.
'Where is my Agent? You hand them BOTH over now and we can talk about a deal. You hurt either one of them and I promise, I will pursue you to full extent of my ability with the entire backing of the Federal Bureau of Investigation!'
The only headset was being worn by one of the FBIs Profilers. So Agent Rodriquez hit the speaker button so he could hear the mans words and what he was saying about the missing Agent.
I look back now and wish he hadn’t done that. What I heard over the next 7 minutes is forever burned into my head.
A drawn out Virginian accent came over the speaker. 'Now come on Agent, You've been doing that for 3 years now. And your still seen as a failure in your department and we are still going strong. Not even that little Rat you had working for ya could help you.’
‘You give me back my agent and the girl you sick bastards!’ Johnson snapped.
A clown like cackle burst from the speaker. ‘Well ain’t that cute! you allowed a child being raped and murdered to go unpunished. Just so you could further your investigations. And you call us the monsters?! Pfft, Typical Lawman.'
I couldn’t help Sympathise as I could tell this struck Agent Johnsons nerves.
In a sense the Man was right. Its hard to defend the hypocrisy of the justice system at times. Johnson traded the life of the boy Ramsey killed for a tick in the win column in this investigation. I knew Agent Johnson had been haunted by what he did for a long time. He barely had a comeback.
'Besides we're way past making deals. We gave you a chance to make a deal. Girl for the Girl and you tried to trap us. So now your going to feel the consequences of your actions.'
The man took a pause and said something that made all our hearts wrench.
'And then we're going to come get the one we want. Whatever means necessary. We're done pussyfooting around and we got a lot riding on that little girl you got there'
My mum and dad held me as if to give me some sort of feeling of being safe. Jessica’s mum looked at us and I swear I saw her look for Jessica to give her the same reassuring hug.
For the 10th today I saw her spirit break that little bit more.
Another pause and a few inaudible noises before we heard the agonized screams of a man.
The agent. But there was something about his groans of pain. It was off.
'Daniels?! Daniels Its Johnson. Shout out anything that can help us locate you! What do you see?! Give me something!'
'Oh he won't be able to do that unfortunately. you see, we thought you might try something like that, being a crafty fed and everything, so we ripped his tongue out.'
He said that with a coldness that had a lot of us taken back.
You could see that broke Agent Johnson. Knowing his judgement and decisions had this man in this situation. A family man with 2 kids, who should be home right now, watching the Lakers take on the Raptors in the playoffs with a cold beer. Right before he tucks the boys in goodnight after a day of fighting the bad guys of the world.
Instead he is being held against his will.
Beaten, tortured and mutilated.
'Don't worry though, Agent. Things will stop being cut and ripped off this gentleman, if he just writes down on this paper what we want to know.'
We all looked at Agent Johnson before my Dad asked 'What is he talking about?' 'THAT IS GOD DAMN CLASSIFIED' he snapped.
'Of course ya know 'BILL'...' The use of Agent Johnsons first name visibly startled him. The man continued. ‘Of course you could put your man out of a lot of misery and suffering. If you just give me the name that I want. You have my word Lawman, I’ll put a bullet in him right now. No more games. But if you don't...’
He took a deliberate pause to allow the gravity of his innuendo to hit the agents imagination.
‘Well lets just say he’s got ten toes and 5 fingers he doesn’t need in order for him to write a name on a little piece of paper... And if needs must, there’s two rows of pearly whites here to play with'
'I AM NOT HANDING OVER ANOTHER INNOCENT FOR YOU PSYCHOS TO JUST BUTCHER!' Agent Johnson exploded. His eyes now glazed over with tears of torment.
There was another horrific 5 second pause before the man took a deep inhale though his nose.
'Fair does Bill, Fair does. Have it your way.'
The dull drawn out shrieks of Agent Daniels tongueless mouth screeched though our landline as he was dragged off out of the audio range of the call.
It was hard to tell with no pronunciation but we were all pretty sure he was screaming the words 'Please' and 'No'. We all could tell his was sobbing too.
I didn’t think this night could get any worse.
Then the speaker projected the mans voice again.
‘Now then. Put Jessica’s mum on the phone please.'
We all gasped. Our Eyes widened and I felt my pupils dilating. There is no way this was going to be good. Jessica’s Mum took the receiver from Agent Johnson. She was already fighting back tears. These people did not care however.
She dived right in. 'Hello, Please.. Please just give me my little girl back. She’s a sweet little girl who hasn’t done anything wr-'
'MUMMY!!! MUMMYYYYY' Jessica’s voice interrupted her mothers feeble attempt at appealing to the kidnappers better nature. These people did not have one.
'Oh my god baby, Yes I am here. Every things going to be okay! I'm here and we are going to get you home I promise.'
The Man came back on the phone. 'Hello Mrs Adams. I need you to know that this isn’t anything personal. Its Just business.'
Scrap what I said earlier. THIS RIGHT HERE. This was the worst moment of my life. This was when we all knew.
'This isn’t the way I wanted it to go down. Honestly.’ He almost sounded sincere. ‘The FBI have stepped on our toes one too many times and they have made us very angry. A message needs to be sent. I hope you understand. Oh, please tell the Matthews family that we'll see them very soon. That debt is still owed. And we will collect.'
Jessica’s mum knew at this point what was to come. All she could do was to find the strength to try and comfort her little girl and be there for her in what was no doubt unimaginable hell for her.
The image of her shaken frame and tears bursting from her eyes will forever stay with me. To her credit she did her best to remain strong.
Telling Jessica everything would be ok.
She started to sing her the lullaby down the phone, from when Jess was 5 years old and under the weather. The song always made her feel better. Every kid has that one song their mum sings to them when they need comfort and warmth. I hope it gave Jess some sense of her mother’s presence in those last moments.
I think I'd have a lot more issues than I do now, had Agent Rodriquez not acted as quick as he did.
He dived over the dinning room table to switch off the speaker phone just as the sound of an Electric drill revved to life and Jessica began to scream in abject terror.
We all watched Jessica’s mum attempt to hold herself together. Tears leaking for her eye sockets. Jessica’s father embraced her mother in a state I’d never seen him in before.
We all watched the last of her soul shatter as she sang 'Hush Little Baby, Don’t you cry' into the phone as Jessica screamed in pure agony for her mum and dad to come save her from the bad men.
She stayed with Jessica until the very end. We never heard another voice on the line after the screaming stopped. The phone went dead almost immediately after. Jessica’s mum collapsed when the caller hung up.
A unit arrived shortly after the call went dead. It was from the US Federal Witness Protection Programme. They gave my family all new identities and relocated us out of the country.
Apparently that was also part of the document we signed earlier. We weren’t safe anymore and needed to disappear. I cant give much more detail on this for obvious reasons.
It was just our family that had to go missing.
The FBI concluded it was unlikely The Swarm would come for Jessica’s parents. They’d hurt them enough.
We said our emotion packed goodbyes and offered what fatuous condolences we could muster.
We packed our essential items in the 10 minutes we had before a black sedan came to collect us with a swat team escort sandwiching our ride.
I watched my home for the last 13 years, fade away into the distance as Me and my parents embarked on our new life, away from this nightmare.
Apparently whilst we were being removed from the country, the FBI finally traced the call made to our landline. It lead to a remote location way off the grid just outside of our town. The FBI and Evidence Response Team followed up to some old abandoned storage facility. There, they found the remains of three bodies.
Daniels, Ramsey and Jess.
We were told one was totally dismembered. One was hanging by their neck from barbed wire attached to the roof support beams and the other had been drowned in boiling hot oil.
They didn’t tell us which was which but when Jessica’s Mum went to Identify her body, that was the final straw.
She committed suicide the next day by overdosing on her prescription Diazepam.
Her father is reportedly still alive but by all accounts he's turned to a life of Alcohol and Anti Depressants.
Our handler says she doubts he'll see out the year at the rate he is going. It always hurts to hear the lasting damage of this horrendous event. I hope they all find each other again some day.
Me and my family have settled now in our new home. We are making a go at a normal life but we will all be forever moulded by the events of that one night.
I won’t walk anywhere alone. I have severe separation anxiety and its effected a lot of my romantic relationships. I can’t keep a boyfriend for longer than a month as I can’t talk to any of my boyfriends about my issues and where they stem from as its against my WITSEC agreement.
Our case handler says we are the luckiest people she’s ever met and we need to embrace this gift we have been given. We are the only family to ever be targeted by The Swarm and make it out alive.
All the other families out there like me and my parents weren’t as fortunate.
I doubt id use the words 'lucky' and ‘fortunate’ Our handler wasn't there that night listening to those people die in some dark dingy old building screaming for mercy. But at the same time, I do get where she is coming from.
I always read the online news articles for my old town and surrounding states to keep an eye on the alarming number of rising missing person cases. It’s horrifying. Mainly young girls too, who just vanish from their homes and neighbourhoods without a trace. The Swarm is responsible, I know it.
Even though, I am told I am safe now, and getting on with the rest of my life. I always find myself coming back to three things from that night.
1- The look of Jessica’s mums heart breaking as she sung her baby to sleep for the final time. A moment that haunts me on dark nights.
2- The last moment me and Jessica shared together before she was taken. That lingering warm smile we gave each other as she stood in my bedroom doorway. A treasure I truly hold dearly on those same dark nights.
And, 3. The comment Agent Johnson quoted about Damon Ramsey in regards to his own WITSEC agreement protecting him from The Swarm....
‘When it comes to these people that were dealing with. There’s no such thing as Immunity’
Please if submitted on your channel credit as THE WHITE VAN MAN
submitted by Pristine-Engine4388 to mrcreeps [link] [comments]
2020.10.23 08:33 Logiman43 Local sex secret video
EDIT: This post is in an article format with pictures and graphs here
I can't be silent anymore. In 2018, out of 1076 abortions in Poland, 1 was because of rape, 25 because it was dangerous for the woman's life and 1050 because of an unhealthy fetus. It means that PIS just totally banned abortion in Poland
Too few Europeans are aware of the depth of this crisis. The current Polish government is destroying the country from inside-out with its nepotism, religious zeal, communistic tactics, social programs and funding verge organizations (or trolls). It breaks every single law, making unconstitutional laws since 2015 and destroying the court of law. How Poland is pushing EU into crisis - rise of populism. The video is 2 years old and now it's worst
PIS staffed every single judicial court with its own people (ending the impartiality of judges). The very aggressive social 500+ program increased the job inactivity of Poles to 48% (48% of 15+ Polish citizens are NEET. Unemployment is at 5-6%). The Job vacancies in Poland are at the lowest level in EU. The corruption and nepotism is rampant, more than 1000 family members and friends are in public companies or in different Ministries. Polish PIS high ranking politicians are also making money together with pimps and mafia (see scandals down there). They are also giving millions of euros from public money to the Catholic Church. They are paying trolls to spew hate on Facebook, via Whatsapp and on the web. Some of them are hiding and not prosecuting pedophiles in the Catholic Church. Poland has almost the lowest innovation in EU. In 15 indexes tracking freedom and democracy in Europe Poland went from an average position of 12 out of 28 in 2010 to 23 out of 28 in 2019. I mean, not to diminish Trump’s “awesomeness” but imagine if the WHOLE republican party in the US was Trump-like. Shady deals, family in the govt, creating discord, staffing courts with their own judges. I’m just mortified.
For further reading I recommend: Sadurski, Wojciech. "Poland's Constitutional Breakdown", Oxford University Press, 2019.
Acronyms and main characters:
2020.10.22 01:12 gggloria Local secret sex video
TLDR: I’m an absolute dumb ass and dated my best friend thinking I was different. He absolutely broke me without a second thought. Now I wonder if our entire friendship ever meant anything. Going no contact because I know that I’m worth more than a quarter-assed attempt at rebuilding a lifelong friendship.
This is a novel but I think I just have to get it out.
I’ve known my ex forever, since we were kids. Ironically he was my first boyfriend and kiss in middle school, but it was just a silly fling between kids. It never impacted me or our friendship. We stayed friends throughout middle school, high school, college and beyond. Like most friendships, we went through periods of being close and periods of not talking too much. But he was constant. I could always turn to him for anything, and him to me. We had each other’s backs so many times. We were there through breakups, losing friends, pets dying, growing pains, you name it. I never thought of him in any romantic capacity whatsoever. In my eyes it was almost like he was asexual. Romantically he was never even the tiniest blip on my radar.
About this time last year, we were both miserable going through our own mid 20s shit. We started a Friday night ritual of playing video games, going to the local bar getting shitfaced until like 4am and going home. I think we both needed the company, the familiarity of a fun routine and the camaraderie we had in each other. We were closer than ever before. We were stumbling around so many nights together, and never once was there even a hint of anything.
So what was different the night the world shut down in March? Was it because we were home and not out? We were scared? Was it just the right place and time? We were drinking at my place and he made a move. He was very persistent, and very clear with his intentions. I don’t know why I let it happen. It led to us dating throughout the shut down, for almost six months.
My ex was always a player. He ALWAYS has a girl, and a back up. So, I don’t know WHY I thought I would be different. Maybe because of the years and years of history. Because we knew each other so well. I thought, we’ve been friends for so long. Maybe what I’ve been looking for has been right here and I’m just too stubborn to see. I don’t know. Hindsight is 20/20. I’m a dumb ass.
Long story short, he sucked. It was great in the beginning when the world was shut down and I was his only option. Then things began to open up, and I was no longer shiny and exciting. He became more distant that I’ve ever experienced. Ignoring texts, being secretive about plans, less sex, wouldn’t tell me what was wrong, kept saying everything was fine and he wanted to be with me. For unrelated reasons I started to have panic attacks. During one, he told me he couldn’t be there for me, he was too busy with work and his other friends.
That shit hurt more than I think he will ever understand. To have someone you love and care about and admire look you in the eye during your weakest moment and say they are too busy for you. In one night 13 years of trust vanished. He broke up with me a few days later because he was “moving to the city” and “can’t do long distance.”
Spoiler alert: Three months later and he hasn’t moved. Oh and he’s in a long distance relationship. Cool.
We didn’t talk for like two weeks but it just felt so unnatural. We met up and reconciled. Things were okayish. I knew it was going to take a long time to rebuild things. But in the end it was me putting in all the effort still. He still took me for granted. He even asked me to hang out, then brought his new girl thinking I wouldn’t put two and two together. Communicating with him now gives me horrible anxiety. So the other night I just ended it. I told him not to contact me again.
I feel lighter, and so sad. I would have never thought I would lose this person. I know my value, and I don’t stay where I’m not wanted. Maybe someday we can friends, but he has way too much control over my mood right now. It’s not in my best interest to let him in my life. What hurts the most is how completely unaffected he is by this. Makes me feel like maybe I’m dodging a bullet.
It’s just hard because of course I love him as a person. But here we go. Time to move on. If you got this far thanks for reading. Best of luck to everyone going through no contact right now.
submitted by gggloria to ExNoContact [link] [comments]
2020.10.20 04:30 throwawayaracehorse Local secret sex video
The following is the conclusion of my senior capstone for my journalism degree. I sought out to explore the truth behind a local legend in my hometown. My professor rejected the original draft due to its disturbing and unbelievable nature, even though everyone I spoke to claims they're telling the truth. The previous parts are available here:
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7
BOB SCHROEDER, LOCAL HISTORIAN: The Massacre at Crybaby Bridge will live on in the annals of Somerset history and lore. Like all local legends, it’s not immune to thegossip and embellishments that are inevitable in a rural town the size of Somerset.
The state news covered it for about a week and it barely made a blip in the national news headlines. The nation was too caught up with coverage of the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. There was also an effort by many members of the community to suppress the story. They didn’t want the travesty to be the only thing the town was known for.
STEPHEN PARKER: How much fight could I possibly have left? How much adrenaline did I have in reserve? I know that a certain point that death might come as relief. I would no longer have to feel scared for my life.
I wasn’t ready yet.
We rounded the side of the house. There was a barn out back, old and wooden. Completely dark. An old truck was parked next to the barn. Maybe it was open. Maybe it would have the keys in it. Nick headed straight for it. I followed. “Need...to...catch my breath,” he gasped. “Me too,” I agreed.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: The Loveless property was a massacre in its own right. That place alone might be the kind of crime scene that sticks with you for years. Five dead at the scene and in all of those different manners.
STEPHEN PARKER: The doors to the truck were locked. We darted to the inside of the barn. We couldn’t hear anything from behind us, no signs we had been seen or followed. It was really dark in there and as my eyes adjusted I could see a tractor parked dead center of the barn and smell the musty scent of dust and hay.
There was a loft towards the back of the barn that was loaded with bales of hay. A ladder led up to it and in the back of the loft under the angle of the barn’s roof was an open window.
“Let’s hide up there, catch our breath,” Nick said, pointing. Looking back it seems like such a rookie horror movie mistake.
The loft was warm and stuffy and Nick quickly piled up a few bales for us to hide behind. We lied on our bellies like soldiers in a foxhole, peeking through a crack in our alfalfa barricade, waiting for the enemy.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: The first body we encountered was Floyd Loveless. He was deceased on the porch with an extensive penetrating neck injury.
JOEY KESSLER, LOCAL RESIDENT, FARMER**:** They were confused as to what to do with that ol’ gal with the blade in her back. Everyone was afraid to move it. I got creative while they was twiddling their thumbs and waiting on the helicopter. I rushed back with my cutting torch and cut it down close enough to her back.
SKYE BRIGGS: What else could I do but pray? I’d never done it much before, but I sure as hell was right then.
STEPHEN PARKER: The mind of a teenager is not a rational thing. I don’t know what I was thinking. My best friend had just been brutally killed and I had seen it, seen him staggering around in his final throes before he collapsed. All of the others, too.
Maybe stress had done crazy things to my mind. Maybe the adrenaline and survival instinct had made it impossible for me to feel any sort of grief.
It felt like we were up in that loft a long time. I guess it was the silence that made it feel that way. All that I know is that I felt safe in that moment despite all that had happened, the dark all around, the warmth. It felt like there would never be another one.
I could feel Nick’s body rising and falling beside me, his heavy respirations slowing as he caught his breath. I could feel his warmth in the crisp autumn air and smell his sweat and cologne.
In the dark it was like we were anywhere else.
I whispered his name.
“Yeah,” he whispered back, and his face was close to mine as he turned. I took it in my hand and right there in that dusty, hay filled barn, I leaned in to kiss him.
The mind of a teenager is not a rational thing.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: Around the backside of the house we found the second body. A decapitation had occurred.
STEPHEN PARKER: He didn’t turn away right away, didn’t shove me off in a fit of disgust. For a second he let me, I think. I could feel his lips and mouth and then he pulled away.
“Stephen. C’mon man. A bunch of people are dead.”
“Oh. Yeah. You’re right.”
He gave me a pat on the back and then whispered, “I’ve got a plan. If he comes here we can go out the window. It’s a twelve foot drop. We’ll just hang off the side and let go. Bet we could do it pretty quietly.”
Before we could discuss any more there was a scream.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: It was presumed that Mrs. Lorraine Loveless had come out to check on her husband, encountered the perpetrator, and fled to the backside of the house.
STEPHEN PARKER: It was a woman’s voice, screaming “Floyd! Floyd!” and then these kinds of yelps that started sounding closer and then nothing.
DAVID NEAL: Next it was presumed that Shaun Loveless, the son of Mr. and Mrs. Loveless that lived on the property in a fifth wheel camper trailer, attempted to subdue the suspect. His body was found nearby with a twelve-gauge pump action shotgun that was empty of shells. There was blunt trauma to the head with gray matter in the nearby grass accompanied with massive blood loss.
STEPHEN PARKER: After a little while we heard the angry shouts of a man, followed by several gunshots. From our vantage point, this seemed to be coming from a direction away from the house. Nick’s eyes got big. We inched backwards towards the window, but then he stopped, looked at me.
“I’m through running,” he said. His face was serious. “He’s just gonna keep coming and coming and more innocent people are gonna get caught up in it. I’ve got an idea.”
I could only stammer out a “What?”
“Stay here,” he said and gave me a smile. “Go out the window if things get too hairy.”
SKYE BRIGGS: They say the explosion could be heard for miles. I certainly heard it.
STEPHEN PARKER: Nick slithered down the ladder, disappeared in the shadows below me. I waited. So much for my heart rate going back to normal. It beat rapidly in anticipation and I felt close to pissing myself as I feared the worst to come.
STEPHEN PARKER: I still get nightmares where I’m at the end of a long hallway. There’s a door on the other end and it opens. I see that figure, that face, the one that had now appeared in the wide doorway of the barn. It was as close a look at him as I’d been able to get so far. His eyes were dark dead pits in the middle of an expressionless face. I could see now that he wore some type of mask over the top half of his face. His head was sleek and without hair. There were several bleeding holes scattered around his torso, blood oozing from them and not appearing to slow him down in any capacity. In his hands he wielded a T-post. Whether it was the same one he had used before or another I don’t know. It looked wet. Something dripped from its sharp edge.
DAVID NEAL: We arrived on the scene after the explosion. In fact, several of the deputies en route to the area heard it.
STEPHEN PARKER: That motherfucker looked up at me. The tractor roared to life, the diesel engine revving, the gears grinded as the clutch was popped and it lurched forward. It had a front end loader on its front-- basically like this bulldozer kind of thing. It slammed into Big Baby. He didn’t fall underneath it, he withstood the blow, caught it right in his arms and managed to push back on his feet against it. The engine struggled and the throttle roared and Nick sat behind the wheel.
Big Baby managed to skitter back a few feet, but the tractor kept coming for him and soon they both were well out of the barn. Nick maneuvered the levers and tilted the front end loader’s bucket to keep Big Baby on his heels. I slid down the ladder and ducked my head out of the barn’s doorway to watch the outcome.
The last steps took place in a matter of fast forward, before I could truly comprehend what was going on. Big Baby’s arms were bloody and he hung onto the bucket of the front end loader, attempting to pull himself up. His feet hung above the ground. It seemed his goal was climb onto the arms and leap at Nick if he had the chance.
He wasn’t quick enough.
Nick shifted gears and the tractor revved forward to a utility line pole to the left of the house. Sitting next to that pole was the shiny silver of a propane tank, one of those that are shaped like a pill and the size of a house.
I yelled for Nick to look out, yelled for him to jump off, as if gunning straight for that tank hadn’t been his plan all along. As if he didn’t know the stakes.
As if he didn’t know exactly what he was doing.
There was the collision of metal on a body and then the sound of grinding metal as the corner of the bucket pierced the tank. The gas hissed as it escaped and I saw Nick stand up in his seat and fish around in his pocket. He was pretty far away, but I could make out his hand movements as a flame appeared in his hand, the flame from a Zippo lighter.
JOEY KESSLER: I heard that explosion and I thought, “what now?”
IRENE MYRTLE, LOCAL RESIDENT: I thought the good Lord was coming down to get us. The rapture y’know?
TERESA RUSSEL, 911 OPERATOR: The calls started coming in left and right, first the injuries and then about the explosion and all in this particular part of the county. It was mayhem for a while. Busiest night I ever worked.
EDDIE DUNN: LOCAL RESIDENT, UNEMPLOYED: I thought it was them damn terrorists, myself. Heard they might try and strike a little place like the Somerset area on account of all our oil wells and the like. Had even seen some A-rabs at the truck stop recently.
STEPHEN PARKER: If this is a feel-good action movie, if I’m the one writing the screenplay, then Nick turns his back right as he throws the lighter. He does a running leap off the back of the tractor just as the propane tank explodes. The fireball propels him forward, singing the back of his shirt and head and that’s it. He lands in the grass and I run to him and I say, “Looks like you got out just in the Nick of time.” We both laugh and embrace. End scene.
But that’s not what happened no matter how much I look back and try and rewrite it in my mind. What happened was he managed to do a half turn before the tank exploded and the flames engulfed him.
Through the smoldering rubble and debris I found his body and rolled him over and it was clear that there would be no happy ending for us. No final words. Just an embrace followed by me scrambling into the house, finding a phone, dialing 911.
That was it.
SOMERSET REGISTER 10/xx/2003, FRONT PAGE: MULTIPLE VICTIMS IN KILLING SPREE SATURDAY NIGHT, SUSPECT DECEASED AT SCENE, TEENAGER REMAINS IN CRITICAL CONDITION
SKYE BRIGGS: What we went through only made me stronger. I hate that it happened and I’m not trying to say I’m ultimately glad that it happened or anything like that. I guess what I’m saying is that after you go through something so terrible, it really puts everything into perspective y’know? All your insecurities, all your fears--surviving something like that, they’re nothing in comparison. Besides, I’m only living the life that I think Hailey would want me to. My new confidence or whatever is a testament to her. I mean if you look at what she’s gone through, it’s the least I could do. I think she’s proud of me, but I’m even more proud of her. I could only hope to be fifteen percent of what she is and has always been.
HAILEY ADAMS: That’s something I speak about at my engagements. How even still after all this time and what I’ve remade myself into, there’s still people that speak from the perspective that I’ve had my life ruined or whatever. I don’t look at it that way. Were there times I got down about what I had lost?
Hell yeah. I got pretty low on several occasions. In the end I looked at it as my life was headed in one direction and then this happened and it swerved to this other direction.
The extent of Hailey Adams’s injuries was significant. She was medflighted to the University Hospital, the state’s only Level One trauma center, where she underwent an eight hour surgery. In the end she was left with a spinal cord injury that left her with paraplegia.
Her disability was only the beginning of her journey, however. After rehabilitation and high school graduation she attended college and received her teaching certificate where she became a cheer coach and special education teacher for a number of years. She would later become an advocate for those with disabilities and became quite active on the motivational speech circuit. She has signed a book deal with Simon and Schuster for the publication of her memoir.
She is married and has two children.
STEPHEN PARKER: Back when I would get those emails from Dylan about him and Nick hanging out and I would get this uncomfortable feeling I didn’t quite understand. Later, I would be able to put a name to that feeling: jealousy.
I wished it was me hanging out with Nick instead of him, sweating in that barn and playing guitar, his jawline and the look in his eyes while he played and got lost in the music. I would imagine it would get hot and there and we would have to take off our shirts and then who knows what would happen. It was a fantasy I returned to often and it left me feeling guilty and ashamed. I tried to suppress it.
I didn’t come out for many years after. I grew up going to church and church camps and all that stuff and I guess I suppressed a lot of stuff, y’know? Grew up hearing the word “f-g” and “fxxgot” tossed around. There was lots of denial and confusion. For the longest time, I thought that the death of Nick and everything we’d been through was a punishment for being gay.
SKYE BRIGGS: Steve and I? Yeah, we ended up dating for a while. A long while actually. Going through that event together really made us closer. How could it not? We would go visit Hailey at the hospital together. We would recommend music to each other. My dad, he would teach Steve guitar. He was my date to Junior Prom and we even went to Senior Prom together as friends.
If you had told me before that night all of this, it would’ve seemed like a dream come true. After a while though I realized something was up. I had no qualms or hang ups about sex before marriage and when we got to that point in the relationship I noticed something was...off. Like he wasn’t totally into me that way? I mean I tried to convince myself otherwise and he would swear up and down that he was, but there was a drunken night in his den our senior year when we went out to the alley to look up at the night sky and he broke down and confessed.
STEPHEN PARKER: I could trust Skye. It was finally time for me to tell someone, but I asked her to keep it secret. We continued to fake it for a while and eventually broke up. We still keep in touch pretty regularly, although it’s been hard in recent years.
Skye Briggs became the front woman to an alternative rock band. They performed at Vans Warped Tour, SXSW, and ACL Music Festival among others over the years. They had several mild crossover hits including songs featured in various soundtracks for television and movies that you have most likely heard.
She is twice divorced and has a daughter and when not parenting she can be found working on her solo musical career. Her debut solo album is set to release next year.
BOB SCHROEDER, LOCAL HISTORIAN: Why does such a tale captivate us? It is a classic tale with much in common with the slasher genre of films from the horror section of the video rental store. There are teens to be sacrificed, bodies to be collected, scores to be paid, and lessons to be learned. Except in this tale, I’m not sure that there is a moral or lesson to be learned.
STEPHEN PARKER: A moral? A lesson to be learned? Stay home, I guess. Wrap yourself up in bubble wrap and never go outside.
BOB SCHROEDER: Teenagers as a cautionary tale is an old concept. They are the bridges to adulthood, yet we’ve used them over the years for various ends. They are young and dumb and full of come. Or is it piss and vinegar? I can’t remember.
They are nine foot tall and bullet-proof. Or so they think. We use this to our advantage, get them to join our wars and fight for us. They will storm that hill without a second thought and we like them for that. The thirty year old might have second thoughts about it.
We give them 2 ton hunks of steel, death machines capable of reaching speeds of 120 MPH. We give them cell phones to check in with us, knowing full well that they are distracting and likely to increase the chance of a wreck. We cross our fingers and hope for the best.
We send them to school with bullet-proof backpacks and contingency plans for school shooters. We haven’t figured out a better solution.
Our teens are lambs to the slaughter. Always have been. (shrugs shoulders) Eh, but most of them make it out ok.
STEPHEN PARKER: I mentioned earlier that I had found myself back in Somerset years down the road. I mentioned that it brought the emotions roaring back. I found myself in the park and I got out and it was mostly empty, but I was under this row of giant sycamore trees, and I walked around a little until it hit me like a sledgehammer to the gut.
I just broke down and wept. I wept for my past. I wept for Nick and Dylan. I wept for what could’ve been.
BOB SCHROEDER: The other thing about slashers is that they often feature the common trope of the killer getting away. The killer is out there, not quite dead, waiting to return again.
STATE BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION NOTES, OCT 2003: A body from the state medical examiner’s office has been reported missing. The body of the John Doe believed to be responsible for the numerous deaths in Somerset has vanished from the lab site. If you have any information regarding this please contact us at (XXX) XXX-XXXX.
STEPHEN PARKER: I mentioned before about pivotal moments and I’ve thought of another. It’s one that I keep coming back to, a moment outside of all of the trauma. Something warm. Something comforting. In spite of everything that happened, I’m glad that I have this.
Let me set the scene. We’re heading out to Buster’s and we’re all a little giddy. Dylan, he says, “Look at us, just a regular bunch of Breakfast Club motherfuckers up in here.”
HAILEY: Oh really? Why’s that?
DYLAN: It’s an unlikely crew is all I’m saying.
HAILEY: Oh, because I thought you were saying its like all of us fit into a bunch of cliched roles. Are you saying that I’m the cheerleader and Nick’s the jock? What does that make Stephen and Skye?
NICK: I ain’t no jock.
SKYE: Wait, are you saying I’m the weird girl?
STEPHEN: No way in hell you’re the rebel, Nick. You’re the geeky dude.
DYLAN: Look, can we just drop it? How about we’re the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Justice League or something?
Just then, Nick starts to sing the chorus of that song from the movie, “Hey! Hey! Hey! Don’t you...forget about me…” And before you know it it was like a goddamn singalong, the whole truck singing along.
So this was another pivotal moment, for we were all happy and it was like this high we would continue to pursue so that the night didn’t have to end.
Now I’m not a journalist or writer or anything, but if I was writing this thing, that’s where I’d end it.
Stephen Parker drifted for a few years after high school. He eventually pursued a career in medicine. He lives in California.
Image of Bridge 17 Years Later: https://imgur.com/a/CwuQxbF
submitted by throwawayaracehorse to nosleep [link] [comments]
2020.10.18 21:49 matchaandchill Local secret sex video
Hi there, long time lurker first-ish time poster. I'm sorry if this is long-winded and I'll try my best to add a TL;DR at the end.
I've hesitated to post this for a while now, but not wanting to cause riffs between our families I come to Reddit for advice in regards to what I feel like is an estranged marriage, and whether or not it's time to move on, or if it can be salvaged; and if so how?
My now-husband, who I'll refer to as M, and I met back a week after I had just turned 18, he was 22 at the time. I had just broken up with a boyfriend (my first, M is the 2nd relationship I've ever been in) and when he sent me a friend request no Myspace, started talking, and eventually agreed to meet and had our first date. He disclosed that he at the time had gotten married at 18 when he joined the Marine Corps. but that it no longer meant anything and that she was out of his life. A week later found out he had a son with said soon to be ex-wife, and then 2 weeks later after agreeing we were exclusive had sex with his ex-wife before meeting up with me at the time and then proceeded to have sex with me. I let it pass I was convinced he wouldn't do it again, but that wasn't the case. Three months after dating he would end up cheating again with two different girls at the same time and when I confronted him and then he just brushed me off as the "crazy ex". Like the glutton for punishment that I was I stayed and figured he'd change and things would get better, they never quite did, I always came last to everything but being dumb didn't see it at the time.
I would eventually leave home at the age of 19 due to family issues, parents' messy divorce, and mom's addiction. I felt dealing with a rocky relationship that I still believed could be fixed would be better than living there. I couldn't live with M as he lived with his parents and they weren't okay with me moving, so for a month I was homeless and lived out of my car. After the month we just kind of agreed to get married? There wasn't any real proposal, no talk, just one day at 6:45 am we just decided to tie the knot. We collected $60USD, went to the courthouse, and we're married, with no ceremony, just signatures, and a certificate. As you can imagine this didn't really change anything, except for the fact I was "allowed" to move in. M would stay out late with friends, hung out with other girls, went to what h called "meets" and I was never invited or asked to go. I just stayed at home alienated from family and friends I left behind. One night I decided to use his desktop and found countless messages on social media with him flirting with others, admittingly made out with some as well. Was I devastated? Yes. Did I stay? Yes, again. This pattern of cheating physically and emotionally would continue for years, but I never left and his parents always convinced us to work things out.
Finally came 2012, I was pregnant with our first child, our daughter (we'll call her J) who is now 8. During my pregnancy, I thought everything would finally change and things would FINALLY get better! But they didn't, he continued to cheat, meet other women, some he met through his job as a security guard or online. He had those "secret apps" where he could hide photos, some nudes, and others in lingerie. Messages of him calling others beautiful and sexy, and here I was pregnant, getting bigger, and he never once wanted to touch me, feel the baby move, or anything unless it was to... "satisfy him". During the first pregnancy, I finally decided to confront him, I read enough messages and seen enough pictures. I was set on getting him to stop and finally be the partner I expected him to be but instead was told "I'm not in love with you anymore", I broke down, as in I cried and cried and cried. So we decided we would split, call it quits, but once again his parents got involved and convinced us to stick it out. Things right after seemed to get better, but of course, it didn't stay that way.
During my second pregnancy in 2013, a repeat of what happened during the first occurred. This time he'd talk to the woman he was flirting with and exchanging pictures with right in front of me. She'd send him photos of her in a two-piece bathing suit (it was summer) and of course, he'd compliment her and basically the same exact stuff that he's done with every other woman. They met through COD (Call of Duty) while playing online. I then confronted him again while he was playing with her and mutual they had in the lobby, he then excuses himself stating "my wife is being a bitch" rolls his eyes and asks "what?" I was speechless. Again we would try to separate but told to stick it through and at this point was told by my mother in law that if I divorced no one would want to marry me, because I'd be a single mom of 2 (J was 1yr and 3 months at the time and our son who I'll call N was 3 months). And guess what? I stayed. In hindsight, please know I realize how much of a complete idiot I was but was convinced staying was the best thing I could.
It will go on like this for years back and forth, periods of me not trusting him, finally trusting again, and having it broken. I snooped through his phone, emails, and social media like a damn crazy woman, and yet I stayed. And for what? The kids, the idea we could make it work, that tomorrow it would finally get better. Until 2018, which was when I became the thing I hated the most, I started seeking attention from strangers, sought out to be recognized and loved unconditionally, to be told I was pretty, beautiful, anything. Though nothing physical happened I still became a cheater too. I still messaged others (about 4 in total, I would feel guilty, ghost the person, and then move onto someone else when I needed a fix). I knew it was wrong, so I am definitely not innocent in any of this. I had grown bitter and angry, I held grudges. I used to respond with tears which turned into curse words and anger. Our arguments got to the point of me yelling back now and him throwing and knocking over furniture, and rather than being a grown-up I just ran to the internet, to strangers. I became toxic.
M would eventually find an email, confront me, and I of course during the confrontation admitted to everything, shared my reasoning, and acknowledged that it didn't make it okay. That I had in fact wronged him, he looked so defeated and furious and I couldn't help but feel like an absolute c*nt. I was no better, I deserved NO sympathy, and I told him of all the people who should have known better, it was me. I knew what it felt like, but I still did it. I knew the pain, but I still sent those messages. But we stayed together, but since then he has made it a point to remind me of my cheating. Everyone I talked to and the message was a potential chance of me cheating, but that's what I get for doing what I did. But this eventually got to the point (despite me actually stopping, actually cutting my bullshit out) where I couldn't message friends without it being questioned. If I was running late from work he'd call and text asking who I was with, where was I, who was I f*cking? I stopped going out, stayed home, only went to work and stores when needed, deleted all of my social media platforms, and left my phone unlocked at all times and out in the open to show nothing was being done. I can't complain, I brought it onto myself and it's what I deserve.
Over time we seem to have gotten better, he still has some anger issues, he's prone to yelling and getting mad over simple things, sometimes taking it out on the kids. He still reminds me that the only way he can get past me cheating is by saying he doesn't care what I do as long as he doesn't. But that's what made me realized, that though I've grown past everything he still hasn't. And now that he's home more (he quit his trucking job to work locally) his old habits have returned; he's out until 2am every other night with friends, spends more time out than with kids, and if he is home he's playing video games. I've got it in my head that since we've gone through this all I'll be better equipped to handle it and things will be better this time around. But it's not. As I type this out seeking advice and others' experiences, I've come to realize I answered my own question. Or maybe I just need to vent, to get this off my chest since I don't really have anyone else.
I've never been on my own, I never had to just depend on myself, I never went out to experience life, and the thought of it doing it now, with two kids, is terrifying. But it has to be done, right? Sorry, this was so long, and if you made it to this point thank you for putting up with whining.
TL;DR: My husband of ten years and I have gone through some ups and downs, he cheated emotionally and physically since we started dating, stopped for a bit, started again when I was pregnant back to back with two kids, told me he was no longer in love with during first pregnancy, and even talked to a woman he was flirting with and sharing pictures with in front of me and referred to me as bitch as well. Over time I started to talk to people too, nothing physical but I stopped when my husband found out. He now holds it over my head, we've grown distant, but things seemed to be getting better. Some of his old habits are starting to come back though, I was determined to push through again in hopes it'd be better this time, but feel like I'm just going through a never-ending cycle.
submitted by matchaandchill to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2020.10.17 18:22 OneSilverRaven Local secret sex video
I'm not going to shock anyone by saying Extra is one of the weaker entries in the Muv-Luv series am I? It's not the worst, that honor is reserved for a very specific side story I am going to absolutely rip apart between Alternative and Altered Fable. But it certainly is the weakest of the four main entries of the original series with only Altered Fable even arguably being close. I don't think it's bad, and I even hesitate to call it average because their are some really good moments here that betray the brilliance the future novels will one day reach, but as many times as it fluctuates up it has just as many turns the opposite direction. I don't think like some that this is because Extra is primarily a comedy, which are universally known to translate poorly, but that is likely a factor. Extra IS however responsible for establishing a precedent that the entire series will follow of "best hair" choice structure which is just the worst way to include a choice mechanic and I almost wish they hadn't bothered. When half the choices the reader is presented have little to no effect on the flow of the story, some resulting in less then 5 lines of dialogue difference, you might as well cut them out.
For all the negative things I'm going to say about this novel however I can't deny it was brilliantly marketed and designed. In the interest of preserving the mystery for any readers who are unaware of the coming twist I won't spoil it here but I'll fully admit I was caught off guard when I first saw it. If nothing else Muv-Luv deserves praise for its audacity and risk taking. But I've got a lot of material to cover here and over 120 hours of content to read so forgive me if I dive straight in. A fair word of warning though, despite rumors I've heard that the "directors cut" patches no longer work I've managed to keep my copy running fine. Which means some dialogue in my version may not match 100% with a clean copy purchased today. I can only think of one instance where this will really come up but it's better to cover my ass now rather then later.
LITERALLY NOTHING BUT PROBLEMS BEFORE I EVEN GET TO THE TITLE SCREEN
So starting the application for the first time meets the reader with a disclaimer that instantly confused me because it both had no mention that the characters were all 18+ or 21+ or whatever localization number and yet at the very bottom of the paragraph stated point blank "This game may contain content inappropriate for some users."
First of all Visual Novels as a genre are not games. They don't have rules and you can't win them by skill or chance. some individual novels have mini games in them, but that does not make the novel a game. Fight me on this at your own risk.
Second, This game has a Lolita... are we really sure we don't want to claim her as "adult" now? No? No we're... just gonna leave that up in the air then? Can't wait for THAT to backfire later.
Three, I have incredibly mixed emotions about labeling a novel as "mature" because "maturity" is different for everyone. I have thirty year old friends I would never call mature and a little brother who's more mature then I will ever WANT to be, it's just a meaningless measurement. Plus calling attention to "Mature themes" without actually saying what those themes are frustrates me because that could be anything from drug use to sex to politics. If I theoretically had a problem with gore, but was totally fine with literally every other "mature" element in stories even up to my one red line how am I supposed to gauge from this sentence if this game is for me? I can't, so do I just put it down and never read it because it MIGHT have one thing I don't like? Of course not! I read it anyway because I already paid for the dang thing and I'm going to get my money's worth. So even if the warning WAS for my one problem category it failed at it's purpose. Now the part that mixes my feelings is I don't really have a good answer for what we should do differently or replace these disclaimers with to make them work better without bogging down every VNs opening with spoiler heavy trigger warnings but their HAS to be something better then this.
But if you think I'm being excessive about what is literally a single frame of information most people aren't even going to read allow me to spend over double the space ranting about the opening cinematic.
I HATE montages, doubly so if they occur before the novel even starts. They're lazy, a waist of time and resources, and actively detrimental to a reader's experience. I've read well over 100 visual novels at this point and I can't name you a single opening montage I don't think could have been cut from the novel entirely without harming the novel in the slightest and four times out of five the novel would benefit from its exclusion. I genuinely have no idea who thinks they need to be put in every modern VN, but instead of only putting them down let me explain my reasoning.
Pretend you're a visual novel developer on the cusp of finishing your novel. The CGs, voice acting, writing, programming, all of that is done and polished and the only thing you have left to do is the finishing touches. The thought occurs to you that you haven't planned out the screens that happen before the title appears, you know the logos and such held over from 90's gaming that everyone clicks through nowadays, so you're considering an opening cinematic. In broad strokes you have two choices. Option one, make something entirely new costing time, money, and effort that people will inevitably watch the first time they start the game and skip every time after that. Option two, reuse sprites, CGs, and backgrounds from the game that you already have and just slap a filter over them with MAYBE a special opening song that runs for a minute.
Both of these options should sound TERRIBLE to you.
If you pick option one you just committed to potentially hundreds of if not a thousand dollars of animation, sound design, music, etc. that could have gone into literally any other part of your novel being invested into a sequence that by its very nature is disposable. If you want an animated sequence so badly why don't you use that same time and money to animate one of your already existing CGs? Or barring that why not just commission four or five extra CGs for the common route? Essentially you get the same result but I can promise you your readers will be far more impressed by earning an animated sequence during the novel then they will by you giving one before the novel even gets going. Their is no justification for wasting your development time on something that superfluous.
Now the industry agrees with that point and often picks option two, which is in my opinion EVEN WORSE because not only do you STILL have all the problems from option one you are now actively harming the reading experience by showcasing your CGs early and removing the surprise of earning them organically.
Now I'm not some kind of elitist that thinks you have to 100% complete every visual novel you buy nor am I going to look down on people who read one route and then skip through the rest of the romance options just to get the full gallery. Feel free to experience VNs however you like. But I WILL look down on choices that actively prevent readers from experiencing a novel the way they prefer and this is one of those. Their is absolutely no point in using a novels CGs in an opening montage, period. It cheapens the experience of eventually earning those CGs and makes them less engaging.
"But Raven" I can already hear someone saying "You can just skip it by clicking if you don't want to watch it." To which I respond with the statement that if I can skip it with no consequence why does it exist in the first place? Like it or not the designer of the game intended for me to watch that video before anything else, and I'd like to assume they had a reason for that. Plus the fact I have to skip it every single time I start the application is maddening.
"But Raven, that's just a common visual novel thing, you can't judge a novel for having something hundreds of other novels do." Yes, I can, and I couldn't care less if it's a common trope it's a BAD one that needs to be disposed of.
"But Raven, It's an homage to anime openings, it references so and so." Well firstly I don't care and even if I did so what? I don't expect my anime to follow VN tropes why should VNs copy anime tropes? And for the record I don't like montage openings to anime either.
"But RAVEN, this is just a stupid nitpick." Okay you have a point with that one, this isn't really important when looking at the big picture, but that's not an excuse. If you have time and money to spend on an opening video you have time and money that could be spent on literally anything else related to your novel and you're wasting it.
"BUT RAVEN! How else can I show people I'm making a good visual novel without animation?" Well this might be an out of the box concept but how about you show people you've made a good novel by MAKING A GOOD NOVEL! Katawa Shoujo, IMHHW, DDLC, none of those novels had intro movies before the title screen and I didn't see anyone complaining about them. If you REALLY have to show off your animation you can always go the Love Esquire route and just animate your title card readers spend way more time there anyway.
But fine, even if you still don't agree with me and somehow think intro montages are the best part of the whole novel Muv-Luv's opening specifically is BAAAAAAAD. Like even by my low standards it shockingly disappoints. The video opens on an ugly yellow brown filter that washes out the background images completely while playing harsh piano music that is mixed far too loud. That's followed by the novel's catchphrase "Save in the name of true love" over a spinning heart which is alright I guess but quickly gets replaced by the worst character intros possible. The bubblegum pink background is changed into a gaudy character showcase that looks more at home in a sitcom about the 80's then a Japanese novel. After showing some of their CGs *sigh* each character gets their name beside their sprite but an astute observer will notice immediately that Sumika and Meiya are getting some serious favoritism. They get double the CGs, Sumika gets an Onsen towel shot, their sprites are featured one after the other in a clear showing of opposition, and the whole thing caps off with the two of them, center frame, before ending with Sumika materializing from fairy dust beside a male sprite which is most likely P-kun.
"But Raven, they're setting up a rivalry between those two characters. You see it's all clever foreshadowing because after you read the novel you see that-" I'm going to stop you there. That is a terrible excuse. Why in the name of all that is unholy would I want my first impression of these characters to be the blatantly obvious fact that they were favored by the development team? Not only do NONE of the future novels lean into that assertion all this intro has done is give me the impression that the three other showcased girls are less important then the chosen two. Before I even pressed the new game button the novel has forcefully colored my opinion toward the entire roster. Instead of organically building the relationship between the readers POV character and the supporting cast I am now primed to see these two specific characters as the center of the story. How in any reality is that a good thing? Keep in mind we don't know anything about these people yet, I couldn't name you one character trait any of them have outside of surprisingly the side girls where the pink haired one blushed a lot and the one with glasses is sporty. If this is supposed to be foreshadowing it should have been in the novel already. If it's something I wouldn't understand until after the novel is over it shouldn't be here at all because obviously I HAVEN'T finished the novel, this is the first thing I've seen of it.
But I can almost get over all of those issues if it wasn't for the fact that the screen immediately after this intro literally serves its purpose better in a single frame.
The title card group shots aren't perfect, but are pretty damn close. Sumika and Meiya are still center screen but unlike the intro video it isn't nearly as obnoxious and more importantly everyone in the shot has an actual personality. Meiya has a sword, which can easily be taken as her being characterized as traditional or Samurai like. Sumika is holding a heart for devotion and maybe even a sign she already has feelings for P-kun. Glasses has a lacrosse stick, the pink haired girl has cat ears and an obnoxious bell, the black haired girl has a sandwich.... okay then. And our future comedic relief best friend character given his different uniform is literally already neck deep in shenanigans. Point blank perfect introductions to everyone's personality, enough detail to guess what they're like, not enough to be 100% sure. No idea why they felt the need to have two title screens and force the reader to click before being shown the new game option but whatever.
Normally I'd dive into the settings menu and analyze that before starting the actual novel but the only real thing it's missing is a sample text indicator and I've stalled long enough already. You press new game, get prompted to select English or Japanese, and then we FINALLY start.
LIKE A BAD CARTOON
The novel opens on a series of diary entries from the perspective of one of the heroines and I can already tell she's supposed to be the "cannon" choice so I'm predisposed to dislike her. You can't tell me how to feel novel! I'll cry when I CHOOSE to.
The first "entry" tells the story of a red haired chibi breaking a fossil, her male friend P-kun telling on her, dick move, and then being punished for trying to replace it with a snail. Not the best first impression of our protagonist but these kids are like what, ten? I'll give him a pass, little kids just do that stuff sometimes.
I like how these little segments are partially animated like kids drawings. It's cutsie and charming.
Next one is short, P-kun wants to go to some fancy school and chibi girl doesn't think she has the grades for it. Months of studying later and apparently she made it in, P-kun pranked her saying she didn't, she was mad.
Now its the summer, she wants him to compliment her swimsuit...
AND THEN THE SCREEN IS FULL OF MOTION AS TWO GIANT MECHAS FIGHT WITH BEAM SWORDS AND THE MUSIC IS AN EPIC LIGHT ROCK BALLED!!!
God that's some whiplash.
Apparently our shields are at 10% which according to Star Trek is bad so naturally I'm concerned. But three sentences later P-kun does 40 points of damage in one attack, so I guess we still got this.
Except we get punched in the face and lose so that sucks.
Like any experienced gamer P-kun starts ranting about strategy guides and lag because obviously he had the SKILLS to win the match something OUTSIDE his control must have lost it for him.
and suddenly boobs... yeah apparently P-kun plays enough vidja games to dream about them and when presumably the same red haired chick as the diarist came to wake him up he grabbed her tits because that's something sleeping people do I guess. But he just keeps going with it, theirs like a good 15 squeeze sound effects at least, and red haired girl who is apparently named Sumika is PISSED so she hits him.
The scene changes to the best music track in the game (That's not a compliment) and the reader gets their first look at the sprites which went the extra mile to have actual moving mouths and blinking eyes. I pity poor innocent me not knowing that I would associate blinking eyes in VNs with Vietnam flashbacks because of this series.
P-kun's accused of squeezing her boobs, which he totally did, but denies it because he's terrible AND THEN HE HITS HER! BRO, not cool. She's like, actually tearing up, SO not cool. AND WHEN SHE CALLS HIM OUT FOR IT HE HITS HER AGAIN! Like I'm not the only one that thinks he's totally in the wrong here right? But I mean even if he wasn't you do NOT just wail on girls man.
Righteous payback is served in the form of a chibi scene of P-kun being blasted like team rocket and it is immensely satisfyingly.
Scene transition to a train, apparently the pair has to go shopping for P-kun's parent's vacation. He hits her again on the train, abandons her on it, makes her carry the bags by herself after shopping, talks over her, and hits her AGAIN when she confuses two types of mushrooms even when she was trying to invite him over to her place so he wouldn't starve. So she hits him so hard he falls unconscious.
I'm sorry am I supposed to like these people they both seem horrible.
*sigh* What else happens? OH! A chibi scene of red hair standing alone with all the shopping bags by herself. Yeah, it's blatant emotional manipulation but she didn't try to grab his boobs and pretend it was a natural reaction so I'm going to cut her some slack and feel sorry for her. P-kun negs her into buying lunch which is just a whole extra level of scummy given his behavior.
The two of them sit down for a burger and P-kun yells at a dog. Theirs a CG... It's okay I guess. After feeding P-kun's fries to the dog Sumika offers to split hers with him and he thinks about how this is emotional manipulation OKAY THATS IT!
TAKERU IS THE WORST PROTAGONIST I HAVE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF INHABITING.
In case his actions didn't speak for themselves Takeru is a selfish, narcissistic, jerk who in ANY other visual novel would be an obnoxious side character who doesn't understand why he can't get a girlfriend. He treats everyone around him like they exist to hold him back, doesn't care about anyone's feelings but his own, leads on multiple women, and is just plain ABUSIVE to Sumika. I can't even PRETNED to like him he's just AWFUL. You have no idea how badly I want to fill the rest of this part of my review with just PAGES of reasons he's not worthy of his good fortune but I'm already over my quota for side tangents and I REALLY want to finish the prologue for this weeks post so I'm just going to have to take solace in demoting him from uppercase P-kun to lower case p-kun and passive aggressive my way to the end of extra but so help me GOD I can't wait to find a good spot to rant about this down the line I am NOT done with this conversation.
Anyway, p-kun has a trip down memory lane about a park by his house where he buried frogs alive...
Oh that rant is a comin, it's a comin, but not today.
Apparently he promised Sumika he'd marry her when they were kids playing at that park but she doesn't remember it because he never follows through on his promises because of course he doesn't. They eventually go home to his room which is just a mess like MY room IRL is cleaner then that and I don't even get visitors waking me up in the morning. p-kun opens the window and gets a book to the face before we get the first choice of the game which makes me exceedingly nervous because its so blatantly obvious the first option is the one for Sumika's romance route. Look, I don't hate you or nothin, but I'm going to do you a favor and NOT hook you up with a scumbag. You clearly like him, somehow, but you can do better. So I pick the choice that makes p-kun whine about a dog taking his fries. Sumika says she's going to wake p-kun up tomorrow, whatever, he references the Dreamcast which I was slightly too young for but makes me painfully aware that this novel takes place in 2001, Ocrober 2001 no less, and right about now is the beginning of the end for the America I wish we never lost so that's depressing. Guess I should consider myself lucky this is set in Japan because we would be getting some pretty heavy war themes if it was in America and who wants to play a VN about cute girls in a nation obsessed with terrorists and conflict?
The next day, October 22nd, is probably the most important single day in the Muv-Luv series which is a statement I'm sure will make no sense now if you haven't read the novels but memorize it because I am going to reference it A LOT as time goes on.
Sumika wakes p-kun by yanking on the locked front door and loudly screaming, which is just obnoxious but p-kun deserves it so I'll let it slide. After throwing off his sheets in frustration he turns to see Samurai girl, hair already done up in a physics defying pony tail for some reason, lying in bed beside him and promptly has an internal freak out. Fair. Sumika breaks into the house by cutting the chain lock with bolt cutters and discovers the pair still in the bed. Which admittedly looks pretty bad but this time hitting him into a low earth orbit was a bit much. I mean he's not your boyfriend, at least not if I have anything to say about it. And then... theirs another intro video.
GETTING IT RIGHT THIS TIME
Extra's specific intro video is probably one of the best parts of the entire novel and I like it more then half the romance routes. If that makes me a hypocrite so be it this is the exception to the rule
I can't tell you why yet, because the subtle details here only make sense in context and I would have to spoil way too much of the upcoming novels but even limiting myself to what's relatively spoiler free this video is still a master stroke. Opening with a much more palatable and upbeat music track the camera zooms out from Sumika's eye to show her and the girl from p-kun's bed standing on a heart followed by a quick CG for each of the heroines. Unlike the opening before the credits which takes CGs from the full length of the novel this quick scene makes the tactful choice to only use common route CGs which while still not ideal is at least an improvement over using some of the last CGs from the romance routes like the previous video. The logo is spelled in frame before the female vocals kick in with a much more tonally appropriate sound creating a sad but upbeat feeling. We see Sumika standing on a hill overlooking the city as time advances before she suddenly disappears with a spike in the music and a brown tented filter colors the screen like an old home video or a nostalgic memory.
Time keeps moving forward but now it's months instead of hours. Snow fall in front of the same window the reader just saw moments ago was part of Sumika's bedroom and when she sadly looks outside and opens it that same nostalgic filter appears over her face. The girl from p-kun's bed flashes into view before the same effect covers her and with that brown tint on the screen the reader watches scenes with the rest of the cast flash by. Theirs a juxtaposition between the heroines and supporting cast as the music starts to swell behind a quick view of several sprites before finally reaching its peek over pictures of Sumika in heart shaped frames like thoughts in the mind of the blue haired girl who closes her eyes rather then look at them. The juxtaposition of Sumika and the girl clearly set up to be her rival is shown as they stand a few meters apart but facing away from each other. Sumika smiling and the other frowning.
They don't exactly stick the landing with the final moments being Sumika and p-kun sharing a kiss on the hill from the opening of the video but this video is such an improvement I'm going to forgive that. The difference between the first and second movie is night and day and that prologue, though short, is what made all the difference. Knowing that Sumika is p-kun's childhood friend brings the tone of the movie to the forefront as the heavy theming of nostalgic imagery and the passage of time highlight the clear foreshadowing that Sumika is in love with the protagonist. Her heart shaped CGs, the heart shaped Sakura petals behind her, and of course the kiss at the end paint a picture of a girl, in love with a boy, but fearful of being or doomed to be only a memory in his mind. The juxtaposition of her rival implies she's in a similar boat, also in love with the protagonist but because the reader knows so little about her the movie chooses to lean into that mystery and show very little about her. While not perfect the video also highlights the possibility of p-kun's relationship with someone else in the cast, not seriously just hinting at it, glimpses of possible scenarios like we're looking at alternate timelines or false memories. Clearly these two are the leads, they are the real competitors in this race but realistically it's possible neither of them will win and that scenario is expressed as a negative outcome.
What can I say, this is just a better way to convey the themes of the novel. It's not perfect, I could have done without that shot of the Lolita grabbing p-kun's sleeve at the end there but it's honestly great as it is. Eventually when I get through Alternative I'm going to have to come back to this video and heap even more praise on it because their is a whole nother layer of secret brilliance here but for now this marks the end of the prologue and also the end of part 1 of this review.
STEP BY STEP
I'm sure their will be a contingent of readers who make it to the end of this part of the review, or not even that far, and condemn me for only reaching about twenty minutes give or take into the novel before posting. But to answer a question I'm sure I'll be asked at some point I think this level of detail is necessary because while nothing seriously interesting is going to happen in the next several hours of the novel something to keep in mind is that everything in Muv-Luv builds on everything else. If I jumped straight in to something later in the series, even a simple side story like "Atonement," I would be at a loss trying to cover all the subtle references to previous work in Age's catalogue. Technically this isn't even the first novel in the series as Kimi go Nozomu Eien and Akane Maniax both came out beforehand and feature the same characters, setting, and most importantly several plot details that will feature in later instalments but I have to pick somewhere to begin and only so many people have read the Japanese only novels. Maybe I went a little overboard analyzing the opening to Extra but if I want to guarantee I only have to come back here the minimum amount possible I'll have to deal with it. Part 2 will introduce most of the rest of the cast with p-kun being a unique brand of terrible to each of them, and I'll get a chance to talk about the strangest character in the Muv-Luv cannon who fights aliens for the good of mankind and friendship or something else ridiculous. Isn't this series taking place at a high school?
submitted by OneSilverRaven to visualnovels [link] [comments]
2020.10.17 04:54 BlancheFromage Local secret sex video
INDEX TO CONTENT
This post will be updated with every new topic to place it into the proper category (below). Also, newer posts will be added into the appropriate topics below from time to time, so expect the content to be expanding over time.
An early list of topics (2014 time frame - from our first year) sorted by topic - in the comments. Note: Reddit only lists the first 1,000 or so topics, so these are topics you won't see in the site listing (though they're obviously still there; you just have to know what to look for).
SGIWhistleblowers subreddit earliest posts SGI is a cult SGI/Nichiren sneaks attempting to shakubuku our newest subreddit visitors from "behind the scenes" Resignation Letter Library of Leaving SGI - first-hand experiences Secondary Library of Leaving SGI - second-hand experiences Former SGI employee Lisa Jones' now defunct Buddha Jones site The Nichiren Shoshu side of Ikeda's and the Soka Gakkai's/SGI's excommunication Supersession: How intolerant religions' offshoots (like SGI from Nichiren Shoshu) claim the legitimacy and lineage of their parent religions for themselves Authoritarianism in SGI The Soka Gakkai's legacy of violence and fascism "Shakubuku Kyoten" - the Toda-Era Soka Gakkai's "Manual of Forced Conversion" or "Bible of Shakubuku" Ikeda's Soka Gakkai and Election Fraud The abandoned safe incident SGI and Murders Karma = victim blaming The SGI's goal of DESTROYING culture Understanding Shinto References to SGI in popular culture The Soka Gakkai's deep unpopularity in Japan The Soka Gakkai's/SGI's dream of Buddhist Theocracy: Obutsu Myogo The Soka Gakkai's Cold War Scheming: Japan as a 3rd World Power alongside the US and Russia The Soka Gakkai's (and especially Ikeda's) dreams of world dominance "The Human Revolution" and "The NEW Human Revolution" excerpts: Analysis and commentary Examples where SGI ghostwriters appear to be taking the piss - inserting subversive content into SGI indoctrinational materials Honorary Doctorates: What they ARE and what they ARE NOT On the subject of Ikeda's hundreds of purchased degrees and "honorary citizenships" SGI: NO CHARITY (by design), completely self-serving and inward-facing, only priorities are enriching itself and getting more members "This practice works!" Spiritual Bypassing SGI and Magical Thinking Chanting + SGI = Addiction SGI and Narcissists/Narcissism - including narcissistic family dynamic Ikeda's constant bleating: "Protect me!" On the Gohonzon Bizarro views of/requirements around the Gohonzon, Dai-Gohonzon The Sho-Hondo: Iconic building with layers of hidden meaning Fine Art Shenanigans: Weird goings-on at the Soka Gakkai's Fuji Art Museum
Yes, clearly "recruiting" is the only realistic solution when your members are all DYING FROM CANCER!!There is no "protection of the Mystic Law." Practicing with the SGI will not protect you or your loved ones from harm.
[www.caic.org.au] The spying charges against Soka Gakkai International France, which claims 152,000 members, were further detailed in a recent issue of the Shukan Bunshun. Quoting the newspaper Le Parisien, it reported that a secret network of Soka Gakkai operatives allegedly infiltrated the Mitsubishi group offices in Paris, which were used as cover for intelligence operations. It did not specify whether the secret agents were corporate employees sent from Japan or local hires, or a combination of both.The above can be found on the Rick Ross SGI forum: http://forum.rickross.com/read.php?5,87661,page=516 Source
These articles represent a precious historic legacy. As part of the SGI’s efforts to promote peace, culture and education, we are preserving and introducing these and other artifacts to the public. For the same purpose, we are establishing the Maison Litteraire de Victor Hugo (Victor Hugo Literature Hall) in France. I am convinced that these activities will be of great significance for the future of humanity. IkedaSo...I’m actually doing a make the world a better place thing right now...
So Soka Gakkai decided to invest in some prime French real estate, and exported a Soka Gakkai couple, "the faithful", to run it (since you can't trust stupid gaijin to conform to "Sensei's" "vision"). I suspect Yamazaki is more of the same - a Japanese Soka Gakkai leader assigned to run the satellite colony in France. Source - from Time to talk about Taplow Court
And it's not like these "poems" took any effort: Here he is composing "To My Dear Young French Friends Who Embrace The Mystic Law" (catchy title, no? No.) on the subway on the way to a meeting, while surrounded by
sycophantsSGI members. He also started and finished that "To My Young American Friends" barf-fest on the very same day he was photographed surrounded by adoring culties at some meeting or other - and it wasn't even dark yet! Them making a big deal of his "poetry" is appalling and contemptible. These "poems" are nothing! REALLY NOTHING! Source
2020.10.15 01:45 sexaddict_liar My (35M) wife (42F) says I ruined 13 years of her life with lies, yet she still wants to make it work
Made a throwaway account for this.
I'm not sure how to format this so that it doesn't go all over the place in a ramble.
Background about me: - introvert, loner - afraid of confrontation - had been a chronic viewer of porn and masturbator since 6 years old - never told anyone about my masturbation or porn, and never saw it as an issue or "addiction" - over the years, porn & masturbation had been my crutch for stress, anxiety, boredom, and my aid to sleep whenever it was difficult - developed the ability to convincingly lie to prevent confrontation and to prevent people from being disappointed in me (for the most part). - married the girl from my first ever relationship at 22 years old
Since June of 2020, some of my many lies that I had been keeping from my wife slipped out, causing a breakdown of our 13 year marriage. This in turn lead to my wife demanding I come clean on anything and everything that would have been a lie. What she found out from me, she claims has ruined her, and ruined our family (we have 2 daughters, 4F and 2F).
Some examples of the lies include: - lying about viewing porn and masturbating to it - lying about bank accounts and credit cards I had to help keep our financials afloat - lying about meal purchases I would do while at work - lying about purchases I had made that I said were gifts or winnings from a contest
My wife is one who believes that when in a relationship, there should be no need for the partner to masturbate or view porn. She is completely against it when in a relationship, as the partner should be all the the other needs, and she does not want to share her partner physically or mentally with any person in real life or on the internet (even in a video).
When dating my then-to-be wife, we had gotten along very well--we had the same interests, we would spend all day and night together, and we would never want to be without contact with the other. I had never been so connected to someone, being the loner that I am. When, one day, the conversation somehow came to her views on porn and masturbation in her potential husband. Since I had never disclosed this trait of mine to anyone and because I wanted to avoid confrontation and her being disappointed in me, I agreed with her views and said I see the matter the same way. This was the first lie to her, that has catastrophically spiralled into the biggest issue in our relationship.
We get married after knowing each other for only a few months. With having a partner with whom I could have sex with, I thought I could be rid of the habit. Life, relationship woes, and work stresses did away with that thought after a few months in to it.
After 2 years, my wife eventually caught me one night viewing porn and masturbating. This lead to a series of arguments, and a "break" from each other for a month. I had felt guilty and tried to win her back.
I went to therapy, and promised to never do it again. I put barriers in place to make it difficult for me to view porn online. Our marriage gets mended with tons of baggage being carried by my wife, only for my life stresses to bring me right back to it again, and in secret.
This time I go 5 years keeping it hidden. The secret is only let out, because in a moment of vulnerability during conversation between my wife and I, I felt the need to come clean. This again lead to many arguments, and her stating she wanted the relationship to end.
While trying to figure out my life, I change careers, and try to find my own way. I also join a local sex addicts anonymous group to try and get over my problem. My wife sees these changes in me, and wants to give the relationship another go.
Fast forward another 6 years to the present. I am now in a job that makes more than enough money to cover our bills. I mention this, because for my entire marriage, I would work overtime and do everything in my power to get special gifts for my wife on the special days of the year. The gifts I would receive in return were always necessities (underwear, sweaters, socks). Any items I would want for myself (eg: electronics, designer sunglasses, tattoos, etc), would always get put aside because there were bills to pay. If I were to buy something for myself that wasn't necessary, or was high in price that could have gone to a bill, it would always lead to an argument. Recently with my higher income, I had found ways to get things I wanted, and lie about how I got them. Or I'd buy items and lie about the discount I got on them, or say it was a gift from work for my performance.
In May of this year, there was a purchase of one item and a lazy cover-up that pushed the gullibility of my wife to its limits. She questioned it and called me out.
More lies had been exposed causing our relationship to be on the rocks again. Fortunately, I was called to work thousands of kilometres from home. My wife and I agreed to use this time away to reflect and for me to fix myself and become a better person who will be honest going forward.
While away, I finally realized how miserable I was in the marriage. Being forced to be alone for work has made me realize that being alone was not that scary as I had thought it would be. I made the decision that I could not be the person in the marriage my wife wants me to be, and that I had done enough damage over these 13 years. I decided it was over between my wife and me, and that we would have to figure out custody of my daughters.
When I returned back to the same city 3 months later, I tired to stay under the same roof, but it lead to more arguments. This time it was because I was truthful about how I feel, and my position of how the relationship would not be able to continue. In an argument where my luggage from my trip ended up in the lawn, I grabbed my necessary items and left. I've visited to see my daughters a couple times, but I refused to return to stay in the house, or return to live there, despite the stresses in finances for me to pay for 2 places.
With everything that had happened, my wife does not want to accept the relationship is over. She keeps telling me that I need to become a man and be a responsible husband and father. She misses the good times of our relationship, and wants the family back together because my daughters keep asking why I don't live there anymore.
I don't hate my wife, and I don't wish anything bad on her as she is the mother of my children. I just can't co-exist with her and be happy, nor can I be the person she wants for her to be happy.
I don't want to stay in the relationship for the sake of my children, because they can obviously see that we are always arguing. We try to hide it from them, but they know. Our walls are not sound proof, and there is a lot of tension in the house for most of the time. I don't think that is a healthy environment for my children, or for anyone.
I don't know what to do here, or if I'm doing the right thing. If I had come to this realization after the first big reveal of my lies 2 years into the marriage, this breakup would be so much easier. Now after 13 years of marriage and 2 children, I don't know what the right thing to do is.
If you're thinking about couples counselling, we did try that while I was away. We did it remotely through Zoom. I paid over $1,000 in therapy sessions over the course of 1 month that ended up the same way we started before the sessions. Ultimately, my wife would not accept me unless I could give a 100% guarantee that I would not view porn and/or masturbate ever again. She could not understand that a 100% guarantee would not ever be reasonably possible. The counsellor even requested a one-on-one session with her to make her understand her decision, and it didn't go anywhere. Now that I have made it apparently clear that I don't want to continue the relationship, she is now changing her position. She wants to put my problem aside, and just work on being together, and we will address my problem later when things calm down.... like that will ever happen given our history.
What does this subreddit have to say or comment on my dilemma here? Is there any advice that can be given to me? Has anyone even read this far?
Thanks in advance.
TL;DR - lied about my chronic viewing of porn & masturbation to my girlfriend who finds it completely taboo in a relationship; ended up marrying her; continued with porn & masturbation to comfort myself from stress after the marriage; was caught keeping this a secret 3 times in the marriage; finally realized I was miserable the whole time and want out; despite all of my lies, my wife refuses for the relationship to end.
submitted by sexaddict_liar to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2020.10.15 00:49 thinkards Local secret sex video
Trump is everything we raise our children NOT to be. He's rude, he's indecent, he's corrupt, he's financially irresponsible, he treats women with disrespect, he's racist, he's selfish, he's lazy, he's personally irresponsible, and he's vain.
But, the top two disqualifications for me are that he is self-serving and power hungry. That's beyond simple political disagreement and goes against our constitutional value as Americans.
Abuse of power and lack of respect for The Constitution
Trump once said about a gold star father: "Mr. Khan who has never met me, has no right to stand in front of millions of people and claim I have never read the Constitution". If Trump had read the constitution, even just got to the part about the first amendment, he would realize that Mr. Khan does indeed have that right.
The top reasons, above all others, that completely disqualify Trump, even if he was perfect on every other front are the following:
If you and I fall into bad moral habits, we can harm our families, our employers and our friends. The President of the United States can incinerate the planet. Seriously, the very idea that we ought to have at or less than the same moral demands placed on the Chief Executive that we place on our next door neighbor is ludicrous and dangerous.I've heard that he's the Lord's vessel, or that he deserves mulligans, and other excuses for repeat offender behavior. Trump has shown since the 80's that he has no respectable principles or character. He demonstrates that every day as President. Howard Stern, someone who Trump has confided in over the years, has said about Trump:
The oddity in all of this is the people Trump despises most, love him the most. The people who are voting for Trump, for the most part … He wouldn’t even let them in a f\cking hotel. He’d be disgusted by them. Go to Mar-a-Lago, see if there’s any people who look like you. I’m talking to you in the audience... One thing Donald loves is celebrities, he loves the famous. He loves it. He loves to be in the mix*.A man who has no principle or character will abandon you as soon as he's used you or your cause as a means to his end.
Protecting innocent life is a cause that’s deeply steeped in morality, but with this political choice [Trump], the movement has shown itself to be too willing to trade moral character for power. - Stephanie Ranade Krider, pro-life evengalical, former VP and director of Ohio Right to LifeIt's true Trump has done a lot for the pro-life movement. Trump has twice supported the annual March for Life. He's called on congress to end late term abortions, banned family planning funds from being used for abortions with organizations like Planned Parenthood, as well as banning international aid from being used for abortions overseas.
He has also declared that he “will never stop fighting for Americans of faith” and that under his leadership, “Christianity will have power” — even though our faith does not call upon Christians to seek power. Quite the opposite: We’re called to emulate the love and humility of Jesus’ sacrifice. Unfortunately, by endorsing Trump and defending him at every turn, our movement has placed power ahead of all else. We cannot look to politics and expect to find a savior there.He's NOT a defender of the children
Should Barrett be confirmed, I would welcome a Supreme Court ruling that recognizes the humanity of the vulnerable, unborn life in the womb. Yet even if such a ruling comes soon, it will be at the cost of the pro-life movement’s integrity. I am confident that, in advocating for this president, we will have lost our soul. The church is meant to be known for our unconditional love of others. By supporting Trump, we show only our love of power. - Krider
2020.10.10 06:20 RAthrowaway394 Local secret sex video
My brother (26) and his girlfriend (27) come by our house every Tuesday and eat dinner and me and my brother play video games or watch a movie or something. Well this time my brother couldn’t come, but his girlfriend still came because we know her quite well and stuff.
So since he wasn’t there, she asked if I wanted to play video games with her, and although I like her, I really didn’t want to, she doesn’t know anything about video games so it really just didn’t seem fun. But I told her I’d love too bc I didn’t want to seem rude or anything.
And this whole time she was acting like her normal self. But then I think she saw I was getting an erection (it was just random) and she started to talk to me about girls and stuff. I think I’m gay, but I don’t want to tell her because I don’t know and I want to come out on my own terms if I am gay. So I just kept talking about girls and how I’m not really looking for a girlfriend or anything.
I said no, and she started to talk about sex and when I plan on loosing my virginity and stuff. And now I was really uncomfortable. Like I just wanted to leave but I didn’t. And she asked if I’ve ever touched a boob or anything like that at all, and then asked if I would like to. She said that I could touch hers if I wanted and “It would be our secret, ok bud?” And I did.
And then she started asking if that turned me on and how I liked it and stuff like that. And she asked if she could touch me and I just simply told her “No.” (I said it in like a definitive and aggressive way, like to make it clear I mean no) That was definitely way out of my comfort zone. And she backed off after this
Everything went back to normal and we just finished the game and then I told her I didn’t want to play anymore and I wanted to sleep. She gave me a kiss on my forehead (she’s always done this and I used to love it but now I hate it, it used to make me feel special but it just doesn’t now) and she left my room. I could hear her with my parents tho and they were talking about adult stuff or something I think, idk, I couldn’t really hear I just know she was still talking to them.
But yesterday I saw a thing on the news about a local shop owner who was arrested for touching his daughters friend. And that got me thinking about what happened to me. And I saw myself like fantasising about it later that night, and it disturbed me a lot that I was getting turned on thinking about what happened a few days ago and what would’ve happened if I said yes.
This is the first time anything like this has ever happened in the 6 years they have been dating. She’s never done anything like this at all. Idk if I’m just over reacting or what. But I still feel really weird and she is coming over later today (it’s 02:00 here and she is coming for dinner so like 18:00) and I feel like throwing up. I’ve been shaking a lot thinking about it, it makes me really really nervous. Idk I just keep thinking “what if it happens again? Do I just say “no” up front?”
And I don’t have anyone to tell besides my friend, but it embarrassed me too much to talk to her about it. And I want to talk to my brother about it, he’s always been like my best friend. He’s always been the person I go to for anything. But I just can’t for this. I’m embarrassed to tell anyone. That’s why I’m on this account because my brother has my actual one.
How do I get over this in time that I’m not a complete nervous wreck around his gf the whole time she is here? Do I just try to forgive her or something? It’s the only time she’s done it and she’s amazing other than that. Idk, I just feel like I’m over reacting because I’m just an emotional kid who can’t think rationally
submitted by RAthrowaway394 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2020.10.08 15:46 aamarketer Video sex secret local
The Jelton event had multiple factions of nen users: Hunter Association branch of Jelton, the Crimson Dragon Triad, and Chimera Ants in the island’s wilderness.
Crimson Dragon Triad Sonata, the Black Death He grew up in a family of hunters skilled in capturing poisonous beasts. From a young age, he digested poisons and built up an immunity to them. His family would add poisons to their meals like how people enjoy hot sauces, peppers, and spices. They enjoy adding all types of poisons to add flavor and enrich their meals like the poison turns the food into a high-class gourmet dish. His parents even hired a Gourmet Hunter for their wedding to prepare a 12-course meal all based around poisons. Growing up, it was a test of manhood for all his siblings to see how much poison they could handle.
His siblings became renowned beast hunters & tamers (one became a tamer of many small and large poisonous snakes). While he was a younger sibling and was bullied and teased by his older brothers, sisters, and cousins; he got caught up in a bad crowd and went to jail for petty crimes. That’s where he met criminal gangs and he joined one. He became their enforcer and uses his poisons to assassinate their enemies. As he rose through the ranks, he was recruited by the Crimson Dragon Triad. His family has disowned him, yet he still carries his childhood anxieties and seeks his older siblings’ respect & acknowledgment, so he doesn’t allow the Crimson Dragon to target his family as he tries to create the ultimate poison to prove his strength to his family.
Equipment: Metal claws and ninja stars Feats: Poison expert w/nigh-poison resistance – Assassin skills (stealth & silent movement) – Ninja weapon proficiency (ninja stars & metal claw fighting style mastery & acrobatic movement)
Malboro King (Transmutation) – His aura takes on the properties of many different poisons that can affect all senses. He coats his weapons with his poison nen. He has built an immunity to his own poisons.
2020.10.06 14:10 kittehgoesmeow Local secret video sex
"He has experience now fighting the coronavirus as an individual. Those firsthand experiences, Joe Biden, he doesn’t have those" - The Trump campaign, with...an angle
Reed Between The Lies After causing a serious coronavirus outbreak within the White House and trying to cover it up, President Trump has returned from the hospital while still contagious to a) remove his fucking mask and b) share his big takeaway from the experience: COVID-19 is no big deal, actually.
Matt Buechele on Twitter: "these doctor press conferences"submitted by kittehgoesmeow to FriendsofthePod [link] [comments]