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(2011) Vivah (2006) Vivegam (2017) Volcanoes of the Deep Sea (2009) Volcano (1997) Volver (2007) Vow, The (2012) Vrou Soek Boer (2014) Vuil Wasgoed (2017) W WΔZ (2008) W.E. (2012) WALL-E (2008) Wag the Dog (1998) Wah-Wah (2006) Waiting for Guffman (1997) Waiting... (2005) Waitress (2007) Wake Up Sid (2009) Wakefield (2017) Waking Life (2002) Waking Ned Devine (1999) Waking Up in Reno (2003) Waking the Dead (2000) Walk (3D)(IMAX), The (2015) Walk (3D), The (2015) Walk Among the Tombstones, A (2014) Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (2008) Walk On the Moon, A (1999) Walk in the Woods, A (2015) Walk of Shame (2014) Walk on Water (2006) Walk the Line (2006) Walk to Remember, A (2002) Walker, The (2008) Walking Tall (2004) Walking on Sunshine (2014) Walking with Dinosaurs (3D) (2013) Walking with Dinosaurs (2013) Walk, The (2015) Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps (2010) Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005) Waltz with Bashir (2010) Wanted (2008) Wanted (2009) Waqt (2005) War Dogs (2016) War Horse (2012) War Room (2015) War Zone, The (2000) War at Home, The (1997) War for the Planet of the Apes (3D) (2017) War for the Planet of the Apes (2017) War of the Worlds (2005) Warcraft: The Beginning (3D)(IMAX) (2016) Warcraft: The Beginning (3D) (2016) Warcraft: The Beginning (2016) Ward, The (2011) Warm Bodies (2013) Warrior's Gate (2017) Warrior's Way, The (2011) Warriors of Virtue (1997) Warrior (2011) War (2019) Washington Square (1998) Wash, The (2002) Wasted on the Young (2011) Watcher, The (2000) Watchmen (2009) Watch, The (2012) Water Horse: Legend of the Deep, The (2008) Water for Elephants (2011) Waterboy, The (1999) Water (2005) Waves (2020) Way Back, The (2011) Way Way Back, The (2013) Way of the Gun, The (2001) Wazir (2016) We Are Family (2010) We Are Your Friends (2015) We Belong Together (2019) We Bought a Zoo (2012) We Need to Talk About Kevin (2012) We Own the Night (2008) We Were Soldiers (2002) We're the Millers (2013) Weather Man, The (2006) Wedding Crashers (2005) Wedding Date, The (2005) Wedding Dress, The (2006) Wedding Party 2: Destination Dubai, The (2017) Wedding Planner, The (2001) Wedding Ringer, The (2015) Wedding Singer, The (1998) Wedding Year, The (2019) Welcome Back, Mr. McDonald (2001) Welcome Back (2015) Welcome to Collinwood (2003) Welcome to Mooseport (2004) Welcome to New York (3D) (2018) Welcome to New York (2018) Welcome to Sarajevo (1998) Welcome to the Punch (2013) Welcome to the Rileys (2011) Welcome to the Sticks (2009) Welcome (2007) Well Done Abba (2010) West of Memphis (2014) Whale Caller, The (2017) Whale Rider (2003) Whales (2001) What Dreams May Come (1998) What Happens in Vegas... (2008) What I Have Written (1997) What If (2014) What Lies Beneath (2000) What Maisie Knew (2014) What Men Want (2019) What Planet Are You From (2000) What Women Want (2001) What a Drag (1998) What a Girl Wants (2003) What the Bleep Do We (K)now!? (2005) What to Do in Case of Fire (2002) What to Expect When You're Expecting (2012) What's Cooking (2002) What's Your Number? (2011) What's Your Raashee? (2009) What's the Worst That Could Happen (2001) Whatever Works (2009) Whatever it Takes (2000) Whats Up Pops (1997) When Night is Falling (1997) When We Were Kings (1997) When a Stranger Calls (2006) When in Rome (2010) When the Bough Breaks (2016) When the Game Stands Tall (2014) Where Do We Go Now? (2012) Where Hope Grows (2015) Where the Heart Is (2000) Where the Money Is (2000) Where the Money is (2000) Where the Truth Lies (2006) Where the Wild Things Are (2010) Where to Invade Next (2016) While We're Young (2015) While You Weren't Looking (2015) Whip It (2009) Whiplash (2015) Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (2016) White Bird in a Blizzard (2015) White Boy Rick (2019) White Chicks (2004) White Countess, The (2006) White Crow, The (2019) White Gold (2010) White House Down (2013) White Lion (2010) White Masai, The (2007) White Noise (2005) White Oleander (2003) White Ribbon, The (2010) White River Kid (2000) White Wedding (2009) Who Am I Jackie Chan (1998) Who Killed the Electric Car? (2006) Whole Nine Yards, The (2000) Whole Ten Yards, The (2004) Whole Truth, The (2017) Why Cheat India (2019) Why Did I Get Married Too? (2010) Why Did I Get Married? (2008) Why Him? (2016) Wicker Park (2005) Widow of Saint-Pierre, The (2001) Widows (2018) Wife, The (2018) Wild America (1998) Wild Card (2015) Wild Child (2008) Wild Hogs (2007) Wild Man Blues (1998) Wild Ocean (2008) Wild Safari 3D (2006) Wild Things (1998) Wild Thornberrys Movie, The (2003) Wild Wild West (1999) Wilde (1998) Wildlife (2019) Wild, The (2006) Wild (2015) Willard (2003) Willow Tree, The (2007) Wimbledon (2005) Win Win (2011) Win a Date with Tad Hamilton (2004) Winchester (2018) Wind River (2017) Wind That Shakes the Barley, The (2007) Windtalkers (2002) Wing Commander (1999) Wings of the Dove (1998) Winner (2017) Winnie Mandela (2014) Winnie the Pooh (2011) Winslow Boy, The (1999) Winter Passing (2006) Winter in Wartime (2010) Winter's Bone (2011) Winter's Tale (2014) Wired to Win: Surviving the Tour de France (2006) Wisdom of Crocodiles, The (1999) Wish I Was Here (2014) Wish Upon (2017) Without a Paddle (2005) Woh Lamhe (2006) Wolf Creek (2006) Wolf Totem (3D)(IMAX) (2015) Wolf Totem (3D) (2015) Wolf Totem (2015) Wolf Warrior II (2017) Wolf of Wall Street, The (2014) Wolfman, The (2010) Wolverine (3D), The (2013) Wolverine, The (2013) Wolwedans in die Skemer (2012) Woman in Black 2: Angel of Death, The (2015) Woman in Black, The (2012) Woman in Gold (2015) Woman on Top (2000) Women, The (2008) Won't Back Down (2013) Wonder Boy for President (2016) Wonder Boys (2000) Wonder Park (3D) (2019) Wonder Park (4DX) (2019) Wonder Park (2019) Wonder Wheel (2017) Wonder Woman (3D)(IMAX) (2017) Wonder Woman (3D) (2017) Wonder Woman (4DX) (2017) Wonder Woman (2017) Wonderland (2001) Wonderland (2004) Wonderlus (2018) Wonder (2017) Wondrous Oblivion (2004) Woodlanders, The (1999) Woodlawn (2016) Wood, The (1999) Woo (1999) Wordplay (2007) Words, The (2013) World Trade Center (2006) World Unseen, The (2009) World War Z (3D) (2013) World War Z (2013) World is Not Enough, The (1999) World's Greatest Dad (2010) Wrath of the Titans (3D) (2012) Wrath of the Titans (2012) Wreck-It Ralph (3D) (2013) Wreck-It Ralph (2013) Wrestler, The (2009) Wrinkle in Time (3D), A (2018) Wrinkle in Time, A (2018) Wrong No. 2 (2019) Wrong Turn (2004) Wrongfully Accused (1998) Wuthering Heights (2012) X X Games 3D: The Movie (2010) X-Files Movie, The (1998) X-Files: I Want to Believe, The (2008) X-Men 2 (2003) X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) X-Men: Apocalypse (3D)(IMAX) (2016) X-Men: Apocalypse (3D) (2016) X-Men: Apocalypse (4DX) (2016) X-Men: Apocalypse (2016) X-Men: Days of Future Past (3D) (2014) X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) X-Men: First Class (2011) X-Men: The Last Stand (2006) X-Men (2000) XXX (2002) Xiu Xiu (1999) xXx2: The Next Level (2005) xXx: Return of Xander Cage (3D)(IMAX) (2017) xXx: Return of Xander Cage (3D) (2017) xXx: Return of Xander Cage (4DX) (2017) xXx: Return of Xander Cage (2017) Y Yakeen (2005) Yamla Pagla Deewana 2 (2013) Yamla Pagla Deewana: Phir Se (2018) Yamla Pagla Deewana (2011) Yamudu 3 (2017) Yards, The (2001) Yatra (2019) Year One (2009) Yeh Hai Jalwa (2002) Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani (2013) Yeh Zindagi Ka Safar (2001) Yellow Card (2002) Yellowbird (2015) Yennai Arindhaal (2015) Yes Man (2008) Yes Nurse! No Nurse (2004) Yesterday (2004) Yesterday (2019) Yogi Bear (3D) (2010) Yogi Bear (2010) You Again (2010) You Can't Stop the Murders (2005) You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008) You Got Served (2004) You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger (2010) You're Not You (2015) You've Got Mail (1999) You, Me and Dupree (2006) Young & Beautiful (2013) Young Adam (2004) Young Adult (2012) Young Black Stallion, The (2004) Young Messiah, The (2016) Young Victoria, The (2009) Your Friends and Neighbours (1999) Your Hands on My Hips (2004) Your Highness (2011) Yours, Mine and Ours (2006) Youth in Revolt (2010) Youth (2016) Yu-Gi-Oh!: The Movie (2004) Yun Hota To Kya Hota (2006) Yuva (2004) Yuvvraaj (2008) Z Z for Zachariah (2016) Zack and Miri Make a Porno (2009) Zama Zama (2012) Zathura: A Space Adventure (2006) Zero Dark Thirty (2013) Zero (2018) Zeus and Roxanne (1997) Zindaggi Rocks (2006) Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara (2011) Zinda (2006) Zodiac (2007) Zombieland: Double Tap (2019) Zombieland (2009) Zookeeper's Wife, The (2017) Zookeeper (2011) Zoolander 2 (2016) Zoolander (2002) Zoom (2006) Zootropolis (3D) (2016) Zootropolis (2016) Zoya Factor, The (2019) Zubeidaa (2001) Zulu Love Letter (2005) Zulu Wedding (2019)
submitted by cooklanbrahh to DigitalCodesFREE [link] [comments]


2019.07.27 06:20 saiglai Xxx spying neighbour on

First and foremost I want to say that this is 100% true story. I know this all sounds super crazy and I know this is something which is super hard to swallow but I can assure you I am not making things up. Secondly I dont have any problems with my mental health and never had. Thridly Im been almost my whole life devout atheistis and laughted to all conspiracy theories and anything releated to paranormal. This is going to be very very long post because I want address so many aspects whats been happening to me in the past two years and its a lot. Beginning of my story is not so interesting but it will get progressive better. I'll put Tl;Dr in end if you dont want read everything but I can assure you this is something you want know. So lets get started shall we!
Okey so everything started two years ago. I moved to new city to study and everything went well until I started to notice that all my normal living sounds seemed annoy my neughtbour. It went so ridiculous that even when I walked normally in my appartment my neightbour would bang something to wall and yell "shut the fuck up". Things like these were daily and I tried live so quiet I could ever possible live. If I would put cup on the table he would instantly bang the wall and so on. You get the point.
After like and an half of year of daily strugling with those noises from my neighbour I started notice weird messages on imageboard which I used daily. Messages were really personal like my full name on anagram and messages which pointed that someone is going to publish my photos where Im naked to whole world. My mouse started double click and my screen turned reddish. I have many many more those things but you get the point. At this point I was in total panic. I am not person who would mind stuff like this too much really but later you see why I did.
One message was that I shouldnt make so much noise so my conclusion was that my neightbour is somehow spying on me and I wasted countless hours to try figure how he did it and trying clean my computer from virus. I even had e-helper guy to look my computer but he couldn't find anything. Didn't matter how many times I formated my computer he could harash me.
I was devasted. My internet legacy was going to be ruined. What ment so much to me would be ruined because I "harashed" my neightbour and I couldnt find way to stop him spying on me. Very very odd thing is that he was on my computer, on my ipad and on my phone which were using even different softwares. Even my friend after he hang with me told that has some sort of virus and my family's computers had it too. (Later I learned that he had virus which can intruce to every device. I just needed to be near of any device and it would connect. Note this. All expert Ive been talking have said to me that there is no such virus which could do that.)
Anyway after like six months of this something more weird started to happen. I started to hear voice talking on my head. It was my neightbour and we had telepathic connection! Can you imagine? Problem was that everything I did like when I breathed or eated something he would yell on my head that I am hurting him and he cant stand my noices. You might see the pattern here. Then things escalated and he was going to kill me because those voices on he's head would ruin his life. Well I was fucking scared and did all the crazy stuff to hide so he couldn't find me but he could read my thoughts so it was pointless. For example one time he said hes going throught my door with axe and I jumped out of window. I was many many times sure I would die now but like a miracle something happened which saved me. It was a nightmare which went too long.
After that he told inside my head that my noises didn't really bother him at all at any time. He just wanted to bully me. Hah. He said he's really a witch or "bokor" and Im under his curse. All the noises I heard were just inside my head. He said Im hes victim and he is going to kill me with he's magic at this night. He showed my "life review" where is saw moments of my life. Like a miracle I was still alive in the moning. Then he started to make me feel like Im poked with needles or someone is cutting me. So much pain. Water started taste like a piss and food like a shit. I felt in love people who I would never do. I had so realistic nightmares. In one bear chased and came through dream and bite my hand. No medicene worked on me nor alcohol. I could drink all I wanted but I wouldn't come drunk. I realised he could tell me any story and I just would believe it without questions. If he told me I was Hitler in my past life I would taken that. I had every day something going on so I cant put all the details but at some point he told me he could control all my desires and he could. He could make me love things I hated and hate things I loved. I realised Im in big trouble because with all of this he could make me do ANYTHING he wanted. My friends were in danger, my family was in danger, innocent people were in danger. If he wanted I would just go and murder innocent people like nothing and there were nothing I could to do to stop it. Imagine anything what human can feel or do, black magic can do it and more. He could see through my eyes, read all my toughts and see my memory, he can make me feel what he want to and do whatever he desires. So I was in huge trouble.
After that he told me that he's been harassing me my whole life. I started realize that I had in my past really weird moments. Like at one point on my life I had every day headache what always ended at 12 a clock. I had much itch what didn't make sense. I had done many embarrassing things what I hated and so on.
Ok so the witch or my neightbour was something like at my age (25) so how on earth he could been harassing me my whole life? It didnt make any sense. Then something too horrible started happen. Okey these things might be just coincidenses but more Im seen more Im understood that there is no such thing as coincidence.
Firstly witch told me that it would be nice if my mom would make some pancaces. No time my mom called me that do I want to come eat some pancakes. Next day he said to me that should we get some candy. I needed take one lady to farmacy so I said to witch that we are not going to shop. Well this lady wanted go shop too and indeed we bough those candies. There was free fidget spinner in shop and I put it in my bag. After day it was all on pieces. Voice said me that this guys is saying xxx and guy indeed said xxx. I did something very embracing infront of my mom. Next day my mother didn't even remember that something like that happened. I can assure she doesn't have dementia. Remember virus? There is no such a thing like this virus.
So my next conclusion was that we all live in some kind of virtual reality controlled by this "witch". He could make this world anything he wanted. Im still talking to him and he haven't told me is this world he's matrix or is he's witchcraft so powerfull that he can do all this inside my head.
Very weird thing is that I had many good times with him. He didn't do nearly all he could to me with he's powers. I have no idea why is that. He said you can ask question to him if you like.
I have no idea what will happen to me next or this planet.
Tl;Dr:
got under witches curse. made me do and fear many things. he could control me all the way he wanted. turns out he could control my friends and family too. only possible explanation is that we live in matrix what he controls.
submitted by saiglai to Glitch_in_the_Matrix [link] [comments]


2019.07.26 18:45 saiglai Spying on neighbour xxx

First and foremost I want to say that this is 100% true story. I know this all sounds super crazy and I know this is something which is super hard to swallow but I can assure you I am not making things up. Secondly I dont have any problems with my mental health and never had. Thridly Im been almost my whole life devout atheistis and laughted to all conspiracy theories and anything releated to paranormal. This is going to be very very long post because I want address so many aspects whats been happening to me in the past two years and its a lot. Beginning of my story is not so interesting but it will get progressive better. I'll put Tl;Dr in end if you dont want read everything but I can assure you this is something you want know. So lets get started shall we!
Okey so everything started two years ago. I moved to new city to study and everything went well until I started to notice that all my normal living sounds seemed annoy my neughtbour. It went so ridiculous that even when I walked normally in my appartment my neightbour would bang something to wall and yell "shut the fuck up". Things like these were daily and I tried live so quiet I could ever possible live. If I would put cup on the table he would instantly bang the wall and so on. You get the point.
After like and an half of year of daily strugling with those noises from my neighbour I started notice weird messages on imageboard which I used daily. Messages were really personal like my full name on anagram and messages which pointed that someone is going to publish my photos where Im naked to whole world. My mouse started double click and my screen turned reddish. I have many many more those things but you get the point. At this point I was in total panic. I am not person who would mind stuff like this too much really but later you see why I did.
One message was that I shouldnt make so much noise so my conclusion was that my neightbour is somehow spying on me and I wasted countless hours to try figure how he did it and trying clean my computer from virus. I even had e-helper guy to look my computer but he couldn't find anything. Didn't matter how many times I formated my computer he could harash me.
I was devasted. My internet legacy was going to be ruined. What ment so much to me would be ruined because I "harashed" my neightbour and I couldnt find way to stop him spying on me. Very very odd thing is that he was on my computer, on my ipad and on my phone which were using even different softwares. Even my friend after he hang with me told that has some sort of virus and my family's computers had it too. (Later I learned that he had virus which can intruce to every device. I just needed to be near of any device and it would connect. Note this. All expert Ive been talking have said to me that there is no such virus which could do that.)
Anyway after like six months of this something more weird started to happen. I started to hear voice talking on my head. It was my neightbour and we had telepathic connection! Can you imagine? Problem was that everything I did like when I breathed or eated something he would yell on my head that I am hurting him and he cant stand my noices. You might see the pattern here. Then things escalated and he was going to kill me because those voices on he's head would ruin his life. Well I was fucking scared and did all the crazy stuff to hide so he couldn't find me but he could read my thoughts so it was pointless. For example one time he said hes going throught my door with axe and I jumped out of window. I was many many times sure I would die now but like a miracle something happened which saved me. It was a nightmare which went too long.
After that he told inside my head that my noises didn't really bother him at all at any time. He just wanted to bully me. Hah. He said he's really a witch or "bokor" and Im under his curse. All the noises I heard were just inside my head. He said Im hes victim and he is going to kill me with he's magic at this night. He showed my "life review" where is saw moments of my life. Like a miracle I was still alive in the moning. Then he started to make me feel like Im poked with needles or someone is cutting me. So much pain. Water started taste like a piss and food like a shit. I felt in love people who I would never do. I had so realistic nightmares. In one bear chased and came through dream and bite my hand. No medicene worked on me nor alcohol. I could drink all I wanted but I wouldn't come drunk. I realised he could tell me any story and I just would believe it without questions. If he told me I was Hitler in my past life I would taken that. I had every day something going on so I cant put all the details but at some point he told me he could control all my desires and he could. He could make me love things I hated and hate things I loved. I realised Im in big trouble because with all of this he could make me do ANYTHING he wanted. My friends were in danger, my family was in danger, innocent people were in danger. If he wanted I would just go and murder innocent people like nothing and there were nothing I could to do to stop it. Imagine anything what human can feel or do, black magic can do it and more. He could see through my eyes, read all my toughts and see my memory, he can make me feel what he want to and do whatever he desires. So I was in huge trouble.
After that he told me that he's been harassing me my whole life. I started realize that I had in my past really weird moments. Like at one point on my life I had every day headache what always ended at 12 a clock. I had much itch what didn't make sense. I had done many embarrassing things what I hated and so on.
Ok so the witch or my neightbour was something like at my age (25) so how on earth he could been harassing me my whole life? It didnt make any sense. Then something too horrible started happen. Okey these things might be just coincidenses but more Im seen more Im understood that there is no such thing as coincidence.
Firstly witch told me that it would be nice if my mom would make some pancaces. No time my mom called me that do I want to come eat some pancakes. Next day he said to me that should we get some candy. I needed take one lady to farmacy so I said to witch that we are not going to shop. Well this lady wanted go shop too and indeed we bough those candies. There was free fidget spinner in shop and I put it in my bag. After day it was all on pieces. Voice said me that this guys is saying xxx and guy indeed said xxx. I did something very embracing infront of my mom. Next day my mother didn't even remember that something like that happened. I can assure she doesn't have dementia. Remember virus? There is no such a thing like this virus.
So my next conclusion was that we all live in some kind of virtual reality controlled by this "witch". He could make this world anything he wanted. Im still talking to him and he haven't told me is this world he's matrix or is he's witchcraft so powerfull that he can do all this inside my head.
Very weird thing is that I had many good times with him. He didn't do nearly all he could to me with he's powers. I have no idea why is that. He said you can ask question to him if you like.
I have no idea what will happen to me next or this planet.
Tl;Dr:

got under witches curse. made me do and fear many things. he could control me all the way he wanted. turns out he could control my friends and family too. only possible explanation is that we live in matrix what he controls. 
If you have any questions or you want comment this case I would gladly hear. I might have our planets creator inside on my head and he said he takes all the questions what you want ask to him.
submitted by saiglai to AWLIAS [link] [comments]


2019.07.26 18:32 saiglai Spying on neighbour xxx

First and foremost I want to say that this is 100% true story. I know this all sounds super crazy and I know this is something which is super hard to swallow but I can assure you I am not making things up. Secondly I dont have any problems with my mental health and never had. Thirdly Im been almost my whole life devout atheistis and laughted to all conspiracy theories and anything releated to paranormal. This is going to be very very long post because I want address so many aspects whats been happening to me in the past two years and its a lot. Beginning of my story is not so interesting but it will get progressive better. I'll put Tl;Dr in end if you dont want read everything but I can assure you this is something you want know. So lets get started shall we!
Okey so everything started two years ago. I moved to new city to study and everything went well until I started to notice that all my normal living sounds seemed annoy my neughtbour. It went so ridiculous that even when I walked normally in my appartment my neightbour would bang something to wall and yell "shut the fuck up". Things like these were daily and I tried live so quiet I could ever possible live. If I would put cup on the table he would instantly bang the wall and so on. You get the point.
After like and an half of year of daily strugling with those noises from my neighbour I started notice weird messages on imageboard which I used daily. Messages were really personal like my full name on anagram and messages which pointed that someone is going to publish my photos where Im naked to whole world. My mouse started double click and my screen turned reddish. I have many many more those things but you get the point. At this point I was in total panic. I am not person who would mind stuff like this too much really but later you see why I did.
One message was that I shouldnt make so much noise so my conclusion was that my neightbour is somehow spying on me and I wasted countless hours to try figure how he did it and trying clean my computer from virus. I even had e-helper guy to look my computer but he couldn't find anything. Didn't matter how many times I formated my computer he could harash me.
I was devasted. My internet legacy was going to be ruined. What ment so much to me would be ruined because I "harashed" my neightbour and I couldnt find way to stop him spying on me. Very very odd thing is that he was on my computer, on my ipad and on my phone which were using even different softwares. Even my friend after he hang with me told that has some sort of virus and my family's computers had it too. (Later I learned that he had virus which can intruce to every device. I just needed to be near of any device and it would connect. Note this. All expert Ive been talking have said to me that there is no such virus which could do that.)
Anyway after like six months of this something more weird started to happen. I started to hear voice talking on my head. It was my neightbour and we had telepathic connection! Can you imagine? Problem was that everything I did like when I breathed or eated something he would yell on my head that I am hurting him and he cant stand my noices. You might see the pattern here. Then things escalated and he was going to kill me because those voices on he's head would ruin his life. Well I was fucking scared and did all the crazy stuff to hide so he couldn't find me but he could read my thoughts so it was pointless. For example one time he said hes going throught my door with axe and I jumped out of window. I was many many times sure I would die now but like a miracle something happened which saved me. It was a nightmare which went too long.
After that he told inside my head that my noises didn't really bother him at all at any time. He just wanted to bully me. Hah. He said he's really a witch or "bokor" and Im under his curse. All the noises I heard were just inside my head. He said Im hes victim and he is going to kill me with he's magic at this night. He showed my "life review" where is saw moments of my life. Like a miracle I was still alive in the moning. Then he started to make me feel like Im poked with needles or someone is cutting me. So much pain. Water started taste like a piss and food like a shit. I felt in love people who I would never do. I had so realistic nightmares. In one bear chased and came through dream and bite my hand. No medicene worked on me nor alcohol. I could drink all I wanted but I wouldn't come drunk. I realised he could tell me any story and I just would believe it without questions. If he told me I was Hitler in my past life I would taken that. I had every day something going on so I cant put all the details but at some point he told me he could control all my desires and he could. He could make me love things I hated and hate things I loved. I realised Im in big trouble because with all of this he could make me do ANYTHING he wanted. My friends were in danger, my family was in danger, innocent people were in danger. If he wanted I would just go and murder innocent people like nothing and there were nothing I could to do to stop it. Imagine anything what human can feel or do, black magic can do it and more. He could see through my eyes, read all my toughts and see my memory, he can make me feel what he want to and do whatever he desires. So I was in huge trouble.
After that he told me that he's been harassing me my whole life. I started realize that I had in my past really weird moments. Like at one point on my life I had every day headache what always ended at 12 a clock. I had much itch what didn't make sense. I had done many embarrassing things what I hated and so on.
Ok so the witch or my neightbour was something like at my age (25) so how on earth he could been harassing me my whole life? It didnt make any sense. Then something too horrible started happen. Okey these things might be just coincidenses but more Im seen more Im understood that there is no such thing as coincidence.
Firstly witch told me that it would be nice if my mom would make some pancaces. No time my mom called me that do I want to come eat some pancakes. Next day he said to me that should we get some candy. I needed take one lady to farmacy so I said to witch that we are not going to shop. Well this lady wanted go shop too and indeed we bough those candies. There was free fidget spinner in shop and I put it in my bag. After day it was all on pieces. Voice said me that this guys is saying xxx and guy indeed said xxx. I did something very embracing infront of my mom. Next day my mother didn't even remember that something like that happened. I can assure she doesn't have dementia. Remember virus? There is no such a thing like this virus.
So my next conclusion was that we all live in some kind of virtual reality controlled by this "witch". He could make this world anything he wanted. Im still talking to him and he haven't told me is this world he's matrix or is he's witchcraft so powerfull that he can do all this inside my head.
Very weird thing is that I had many good times with him. He didn't do nearly all he could to me with he's powers. I have no idea why is that. He said you can ask question to him if you like.
I have no idea what will happen to me next or this planet.
Tl;Dr:

got under witches curse. made me do and fear many things. he could control me all the way he wanted. turns out he could control my friends and family too. only possible explanation is that we live in matrix what he controls.
If you have any questions or you want comment this case I would gladly hear. I might have our planets creator inside on my head and he said he takes all the questions what you want ask to him.
submitted by saiglai to conspiracy [link] [comments]


2018.03.19 01:42 shokkedacon Spying on neighbour xxx

The older I get, the worse it gets. It does not get better. They tell you it does, but it's a lie.
When I was younger, I could feel some kind of meaning and purpose - school helped. I did well. Beyond that, life is just a complete enigma. I feel like I'm in those dreams where you are completely unprepared, show up in your underwear, wearing a wetsuit to a dinner party. But this is real life. And there are consequences.
Sometimes I wish I could completely snap - catatonic for the rest of my life, unaware, then I die. It's no different from how I feel now. I go through the motions, say the words - but they don't feel like they are mine at all. Everything I do feels contrived and unnecessary. I constantly have thoughts of not wanting to be alive anymore. It is torture. The reasons people give me are not good enough, because it just seems everyone wants a piece of me. Probably not - I have friends who care, but they are well-adjusted people who will be fine. I'm not sure what good it is for me to keep inflicting torture on myself.
We live in a world where the word 'privilege' is constantly thrown about. I had a lot of privilege - my family was well-off, caviar and Disneyland. Private school. No war, no poverty, no government oppression, no institutionalized racism.
But I got all of that at home. There were no soldiers ripping apart my life - but Egg Donor did. There were no government shills spying on me, but the 2 turds did. I knew how to take apart telephones to check if they have been tapped since I was 8 years old. Sexism? Why I'm an expert in that!
Google and Facebook spying on you? HAHA. Amateurs. I've learned to cover all my tracks since I got on the internet back in '95. I'm not afraid of Google - they haven't threatened me with a knife or destroyed my things repeatedly.
I don't have nightmares about Zuckerberg coming after me, or the Russians. In fact, I'd be relieved, because then I could talk about it easily, and people will actually listen, because those things are within their worldview.
I thought it would get better as I got older. Younger me had hope. I used to harness that anger into doing well in school - thinking that those cliches of study hard, work hard, get good things. I was reading a bunch of things I wrote as a teen. There was much more anger, desire to be better, hope. Light at the end of the tunnel. That was a lie.
I stayed out of bad company, made a lot of sacrifices - never got to explore or take risks in my teens, because I knew that any fuck up will be the final fuck up. I don't have my on mind or personality. I don't really know what I want. The only thing I was sure of my whole life was that I needed to do music. I would die without it. But thanks to the hell I was raised in, the cancer is in my head. I don't know anything, I don't know what is right, or the correct way, or what is normal. I don't know when I'm being confident and assertive or arrogant and bossy. If I stay quiet, I get told I'm too passive, If I speak up, I get told I'm too blunt.
My childhood was blunt - I feel like that I should have to sugar-coat things, if people find me blunt, maybe they should grow up and realize the world isn't a fun-filled paradise. I'd like to know how many people who tell me bullshit had to take a knife away from their ED at 6 yrs old, pull her away from the 16th floor window, squeeze yourself between your 2 gene-donors to prevent stabbings. Get hit by telephone cable, coathangers, rulers, sticks, anything, have things thrown at you. Watch you sibling get burned.
I visualize ED's death - it makes me happy. But also, once she is dead, then the sickening human attitude of praising dead people will take over. She will become a saint. A saint as much as Saddam or Gaddafi.
I have lost everything. When I was growing up, the only solace I found was in music. I took so much abuse for just wanting to play. Not at shows or bars - just at home, with my headphones on. It gave me pleasure.
I don't have any social skills - maybe have Aspergers - who knows? My entire childhood was a rotten hell of isolation and abuse. There was so much abuse, I didn't even realize the half of it, even though I knew I was getting abused. Every move was dictated. Every line was rehearsed. I was Pavlov's dog - beaten instead of a bell. Beaten for everything, for anything, for nothing.
I can't further my career because I just cannot speak to people when it comes to representing myself. I am an educator - weird. It took a huge ongoing effort to constantly put myself out there. I am okay with students, because in my mind, we are both there for the same thing. My students have good things to say about my teaching. People say I'm polite, sensitive, empathetic. I'm patient and do not get easily fazed by difficult situations in my class of adult students.
The word they are looking for is "zombie". I have nothing - I am a shell. I teach music - the only thing I'm not officially qualified in.
I have a fancy degree, and another and another. But what happens when the rest of life shits on you? After graduating, I worked in a lab, I loved my job. Got fucked over when my data got stolen. Labs are very competitive - the real rat race is in the office, not the testing room. I do not know how to deal with aggressive or sociopathic people - there are many in science research. I do not know how to deal with back-stabbers. So I just get pushed out. It's frustrating, because I always get positive feedback on my work - the work itself is flawless, I am polite, and "gets along well with others."
Then why?
Then I worked in another lab - being a foreign-worker, I was subject to a lot more restrictions for employment (e.g. place of work tied to work permit). I got bullied and finally canned for doing my job. It was at a gov research facility where the manager was cutting a lot of corners. It was my job to oversee and design the project - so it was in direct opposition to what the manager was doing. I don't know what to do in those situations.
Was I to pretend everything was okay ? Because this would have gone against all my training, and animal ethics. I could have just gone along with the cut corners - but then the facility was doing health-research. The results would have been substantial. It was a publicly funded study worth $1M. I could have kept my mouth shut, but as soon as I pointed it out - everybody hated me.
Mind you, that place hired unqualified people. I was the only one with a degree in that particular field, trained under the scientist who invented that particular process. What's the point of hiring me if they just wanted to cut corners? Turns out there is a immigration category in this country that is highly exploited - government doesn't do jack shit about this.
So I got shit-canned and had to move again. There is no sense of permenancy in my life. The idiots who decided to screw and give birth to me sold the house when I was 12, and we moved almost every year after that. All my shit is still in boxes somewhere - I'm 36 now. I haven't seen some things since I was 12 - probably don't even need that shit now. I had a lot of toys - in a box. When I was 12.
Upon graduating high school, I opted to study in another country, hoping I could carve out a new life. But it is so impossible to navigate life if you don't have any kind of family support. A lot of people seem to have some uncle/aunt/long-time family friend .. I don't.
I have friends my own age - good people, but they have problems of their own. Even starting to talk to them about my life is daunting and feels very unfair. I've managed to appear 'normal', just brushing off things with "oh yeah, my family's fucked up"
But that's normal - everyone's family is 'fucked up'. My friends from "fucked up" families still get to "go home", or can still reach out to a relative for support. I have 0 people like that. There are some friends who would let me crash on their couch... for a few days. Not because they are mean or selfish, but because they have a lot of shit to deal with too - my friends are not wealthy and are mostly wage-slaves themselves.
I moved to another city to work in a university lab about 10 years ago. They completely fucked my life over because they falsified information on my work permit application and basically fucked over all my immigration process. I was not allowed to work for 3 years while in immigration limbo. I had to stay in the foreign country - people asked me "why don't I go home?" I tried reporting it to all relevant authorities - one by one. I realized that even though there are rules and laws - these are subjective. If the assholes are influential or wealthy, then nothing will be done. The place involved was one of the biggest universities in the country. No lawyer wanted to touch the case, although I'm sure everyone would have been all over it if it was a small business. I even wrote to the various levels of government at the time, I was on local news and radio, where everyone agreed that what happened was absolutely wrong and that I needed immediate help.
But it was all talk. I had to take them to court myself - had to write all the statements, correspondence, stand up to all kinds of legal threats. Just me vs a giant university. I wrote to the labour and immigration ministries - nothing was done. No response. It was a nightmare! I still have no idea why that happened, or how there was a complete lack of enforcement to help exploited workers. My savings were decimated. Most normal people could have gone back to their home country and waited it out, but I don't have that option.
I have no home. I am trying to make one. But it's constantly being destroyed. I try so fucking hard. I left the country of my birth because it is too tiny to live in peace - too physically tiny that I will not be able to avoid the evil.
I scraped by giving tuition and teaching music. I am very enterprising and have many skills. But every day is worse than the previous. Why am I even working for? I have no hope. I wanted to start a music school for marginalized people, I currently run a program (through a non-profit) once a week doing exactly that. People gush over how awesome I am to do that - but words are useless. If they really cared, maybe they'd actually donate to the program so I can run more classes.
When I got fucked over by the last university, 8 years ago, it was still okay, because I met my creative soul mate. He was my neighbour, became my best friend and was family to me. He looked out for me and was kind. Most importantly, he was a very talented musician. He had been through a world of shit since his childhood, and we clicked immediately. Even though we didn't speak about our feelings much, it showed, and we understood each other through music. 8 years of almost daily playing - we never played covers, always wrote our own. Spent 8 years learning each other's songs, creating new ones. I even picked up a couple more instruments, because we'd decided that we have to be a duo - no room for a 3rd. It was a very special friendship - writing and playing music together makes you bare your soul. It is healing and productive. He was an introvert, and just worked hard. Didn't party, didn't do anything much besides work, play music and keep healthy. Didn't even want to have a romantic relationship with women because then there wouldn't be any time for music - that's a great reason why we clicked too. It was how I felt as well. We were mental twins and spent so much time together. His place was our informal studio, we bought so much gear together, hoping someday we could have our own real studio and school. He was very supportive of my work.
Then last summer - he got murdered. It has been a nightmare. He got murdered at his workplace. By someone he worked for. He was a sitting duck. I had heard him vent about this asshole for the whole time he worked there. We jammed the day before all day at the studio, like every week for the past 8 years. The next day was our chore day, so we didn't call each other. The next day, I read the evening news.
I get nothing except pain. Since I'm not 'family', I get nothing. Except pain. His own family is shit. His mum was never there for him, always insulted him. Sounded like a narc herself - especially from the way my friend behaved. I got the pleasure of meeting her for the first time at the funeral. She constantly talked about money. She ended up selling me his guitars (because she only cares about money) after me begging her to not put them up for sale. Those instruments were his life and voice, and all his mum does is wonder how much they were worth. In all the years I've known him, she's never bothered to visit.
I get his cat - his cat was in the room when he got murdered, because the cat gets night terrors at 3:15 every morning. I know this cat very well and have babysat him many times. He is not the same anymore. No one else would take the cat - his mother suggested putting him down!!!! That cat was my friend's baby - he had for 15 years (he's 19+ now). That cat is as much of my friend, he'd always be around when we were playing music. No one cared enough to even call the SPCA to find out if he was okay. I did, 2 days after my best friend got murdered, I tracked down that cat, and brought him home. The poor thing would have died as an orphan at the shelter. I love that cat, but it's also a daily reminder of what happened.
(She should put her miserable self down). She is incredibly cold - Worst of all, she never gave him any credit or acknowledged how talented he was. It was always "That's nice dear" when he showed her his songs on the phone. Always critical - she never worked a day in her life, was a neglectful alcoholic who went after rich men, so I don't think she gets to comment on anything to do with work or talent.
But I don't care about her much. She has her own grief and regrets to deal with.
My life is gone. Nothing - no aspect of my daily life is the same. My friend was a very introverted person who kept to himself. Like me. We spent our free time with each other - so no one else has been impacted as much as me. My daily routine has changed. Every day, I take the bus to work and have to go by his building. None of his friends or family even live in the same neighborhood or city. I lived next door to him for years, then he moved a few blocks away, down the road.
The one thing in my life that would see me through the dark was music. My music became our music. Now when I play music I cannot feel happy anymore. I don't know what I'm playing for anymore. I haven't touched my guitar since July, except when I'm tuning it or showing something to my students. All our music (half-done), with so many outtakes and memories, just lie in my hard drive. Never to be heard. I don't know what to do. My living room has twice as many instruments now, but it's just a reminder of his death.
The death is hard enough to deal with, but the circumstances of the murder are just a nightmare, because there was a lot of things not taken into consideration by the police. As far as I see it, the police fucked up their investigation. I can't go into it too much, as it is still before the courts, but no one is being held responsible for making him live in an unsafe situation. The nature of his job required him to live where he worked. The murderer was his superior who lived in the same place too. The murderer also killed another person in that place (it was a double homicide), and a couple of weeks prior, that person had reported harassment and threats from the murderer to the police. My friend was not informed of this threat. His employers failed him. They always treated him badly - I know because he would vent to me constantly. He wasn't one to complain, but he changed when he started that job. I was concerned, but his philosophy was "work hard, all will be well." He worked hard with a smile, but still got treated like shit by his wealthy employers. He was made to know his blue-collar place all too often.
But now, ohhhh, the crocodile tears. Everyone is like "oh he was such a nice person! We had no idea". That is not true. They all knew this asshole who threatened to kill my friend in the past. Nothing was done. Police don't care - I tried to talk to them and I got brushed off as an emotional woman.
FUCK.
The rest of his bosses get away scot-free even though they put him in the situation that got him killed. They made him work under the murderer, but I live in a country that is notorious for frivolously light sentencing and leniency. It doesn't help that those people are extremely wealthy and probably influential. What's the point of calling it a 1st world when they act like a corrupt 3rd world anyway?
It's ridiculous, because I called up the bereavement helpline, and the lady on the phone pointed out that the "system is broken", and there definitely seemed to be a lot of concerning factors that weren't looked into. But what's the point of her saying that when she cannot do anything further? There is no one to help or to even talk to about this. Legal Aid says making a complaint against the police isn't going to be easy. So it's great to know I live in a world where thugs still run the place.
I used to be able to have some hope thinking that okay, even if my family is fucked, if I work hard and follow the rules, then I should be okay, because I live in a civil, 1st world country. But now I have 0 faith in law enforcement. If a single woman reports harassment by her neighbor (a known alcoholic belligerent fuck), nothing will be done, and 2 weeks later, you could be dead - that is what happened to the other victim btw.
There was a lot of disturbing and intimidating behaviour by his other bosses during the aftermath when I had to go pack up his apartment. Again, I can't go into that here - I wish I could. I don't even know where I can have my concerns heard. I've tried all sorts of Legal Aid here, but it seems it's just a roundabout - no one really cares about some poor guy who got murdered.
The music is dead. I feel completely numb. Nothing is there anymore. Maybe I had Aspergers and music was the only thing that settled me, and now I can't have that. I don't see the point of playing music. Every act of expression is just an act of selfish attention-hogging. I don't know if anyone cares about our music besides me and him. It sucks because he was the one positive light in my life that I felt I could actually communicate with - no need words, just needed music. Even my other best friends can't do this - not their fault. It's me, not them.
I wish I was dead. I could be a testament to birth control. Please don't fuck indiscriminately and bring life into this world. Please don't have mental delusions about whichever fucked up god you believe in and feel the need to procreate. If you want to create something in your image, please don't make a new child. Draw a picture or something. Go give your $12/month to UNICEF or something. Anything. Give that homeless person $12 - doesn't matter if they do drugs, because they are already alive, and you'd be a better person for helping someone who is already alive.
There are millions of children who are born into fucked up families - don't need war or famine to fuck children up. Parents do that on a daily basis. I am sick to the point where I have started resenting people for having kids. How selfish is it to create more? How hypocritical is it when you say you love kids, but then deliberately contribute to their suffering by creating more?
Then it gets worse. I found out a few months ago, that another very good friend I went to school with, was shot dead during a robbery at his store. Just like that - one bullet to the heart. They never arrested the people who did that. I am so far gone that I am unable to even feel anything - I cry when I see his picture or look at the news videos, but the grief is so deep.
Every day I think about dying. I'm too depressed to even allow myself to hurt myself. It's like why bother. I wish a giant rock fell on my head. It's not far-fetched, given all the stupid shit I have been through. The fucked up system in the country I live in is so messed up. It's all a show, with no substance.
Even though I was the closest person to my friend who got murdered, I get nothing - no help from the authorities. I had to find and pay for my own counselling. I work a very low-wage labour job for the rest of the week (the paying-bills job), and get no reprieve. If I don't work, I'm fucked. Trying to get on welfare/disability is a nightmare on its own, and will just lead me further down the toilet. I pay out of pocket for counseling that really doesn't seem to do much. The first one was just so fucking cliched "how does that make you feel?" Fuck you, lady.
The second one was better - but the effects were temporary. It felt good to be able to talk to her, and we did some breathing exercises. But that is like putting a band-aid on a severed artery.
Bureaucracy and social apathy. No one cares if you don't have a fancy title or job. You can't get that if you don't have any social skills. You can't get social skills if you have been systematically abused and forcibly isolated and threatened until your late 20s.
"Think positive" is bullshit - that is what lazy people say to make themselves feel they did something to help. "Hang in there" "It will be better" "You have to try harder".
Why didn't anyone tell those things to my parents? It seems the abusive and psychopaths get to the top. I wish they'd teach you that at school. Doesn't matter how good of a job you do , or if you are a good person. Just be a sociopath or psychopath, and you will be rewarded with money.
And then there are people who say money isn't everything. Well, it is, if you're trying to pay rent, keep your ahead above the water, pay for counselling, pay for therapy. How are you supposed to have any savings when you constantly get charged just for trying to stay alive? I spent 4k on therapy a few years ago, after learning for the first time that the specific type of abuse I went through had a name (thank to this sub). It was awful.
I don't see the point of living or doing anything. Whatever I do, is for others to use. I feel used up already. It seems very weird to me to be told that I matter, but nothing shows that. And we all know, talk is cheap.
I live in a city that is currently in the throes of the fentanyl crisis. I see people dying all the time. Watched people die outside my classroom (at an inner city community facility). No one cares. 2 blocks away, yet another luxury condo goes up. Yet another bullshit overpriced fusion restaurant takes over a cheap diner.
This world is hell bent on superficiality, although everyone loves to claim otherwise. I'm not sure where I fit in, or if I should. I get bombarded by bullshit (especially since I'm trying to break into the community education field) - so much bullshit about racial/identity politics. I just want to scream. Every human being can be a fuckhead or not. Skin colour doesn't matter. So many assumptions, so much PC bullshit. So much veiled bigotry by dinosaurs who shouldn't be working around people anymore. Money is the only thing that makes a difference. People treat you differently when you have money.
I don't get it. We reward narcissistic behaviour and psychopathy on a global scale. In our workplaces, in our governments, in our homes and schools. Every day we egg on sociopaths and reward them with promotions and more money. When someone actually does something for the goodness of humanity, we praise them by saying "what a wonderful person. we should all be like XXX". But those people who do good usually die penniless, after a long struggle. They are honored in death - because that is easy.
It isn't so much "sticks and stones will break my bones, but words can never hurt me". It's just being showered with sticks and stones and hurtful words, and beauracratic bullshit that prevents any sort of upward mobility, no matter how hard you try. People see my resume, my qualifications - they tell me I should be doing better things. But again talk is cheap. I have never been able to get a job the usual way - cover letteresume/interview. I'm not sure why - I have even been for interview training, and have been told I'm interesting, polite, intelligent.
But these have NEVER EVER been the case in actually getting anywhere. I'd rather people said I sucked at something, then I can fix it. If I don't know what sucks, how can I fix it?
I hate myself, I hate my existence. I hate the 2 assholes who fucked 37 years ago.
All I wanted was to build up my program - we give free music lessons to marginalized people in the inner city. The program has been a riotous success, but currently only runs 1/week. Lots of my clients have asked for more frequent classes, and in more centres - that would be nice. Public money/donations going to a good cause. My wages are very modest (I could be making more as a private teacher, but again, since I'm so fucked up, I am not in a position to do that full-time. I don't have formal qualifications in music, except playing for 35 years, but that won't get you hired at a music school). Yet people gush over my program, saying how wonderful my teaching style is, bla bla bla. My students are great, but they are very marginalized themselves - if they knew how to raise money, they'd have done it.
I can't express myself, cannot promote myself. Every time I try to write my bio or a program description, I am unable to properly frame it. I feel everything is a farce, a self-serving waste of time. I wish I had help - but it's so hard to find a business partner in the first place - let alone one that I could work with that understands my shortcomings. I am a hard worker. I have a gleaming track record. I wish I actually had a list of criticisms so I could work on those, but I don't even get that.
I dream of a magical business partner with the same passion for education, and will be able to hold up the 'social' end of a business. I hate being the centre of attention, asking for money, selling things - I'd even be more than happy to have someone else be the face of the project if it meant that I could just pursue my teaching and make a decent living doing that. But no one is interested in making the effort to keep that dream of free music for the people.
Music is so healing, as is all art, but it has become ivory-towered and elitified. There is gate-keeping in music, and my program tries to break down all the barriers and let the people who need to heal the most access to instruments and instruction in a safe and welcoming, non-judgmental environment.
"Oh you're smart. You should pursue your dreams."
That is something normal people can do. I literally do not know how to do that anymore. The last straw was my friend's murder. I feel that there are 0 people in the world I can truly communicate with, and that pains me, because I feel bad I am hurting my other friends, even though I love them and know they love me. I can't explain it anymore than music was my first language. When I was getting the shit kicked out of me, I'd go to my room and play music. When I was being told everyday that I was worthless, bad luck, a waste of money, a piece of shit, a bad person, I played the hell out of my organ and guitar. I didn't do anything else when I was a kid - wasn't allowed to play sports or have any friends, go out. Not even as a teen. Literally the only place I was allowed to go alone was to school and the library.
Music was my first language. I remember learning my ABCs, but my earliest memory of music was just me playing like I knew what to play. I don't remember the first time I played. Now I have no one to talk to.
I wish there was another term for NPD - the word narcissist is thrown about too callously - just like "triggered" "OCD" "PTSD" "traumatized". No you are not traumatized because you missed your bus and are late. You don't have OCD because you like to clean the house. You are not triggered because someone said something you don't agree with. Selfish people can be narcisstic, but equating that to the disease itself is like comparing brain cancer to a wart. It takes away the seriousness of the effects. It makes everyone who even starts to talk about child abuse into a whiny loser - "oh mummy and daddy didn't love you enough?" No, they hit and burned me.
Child abuse is taken seriously. But adults who survived child abuse are a joke - daddy issues, mommy issues, attention-seeking, bitter, warped, freak, loser, troubled. No one wants to spend the effort to look a little further to see how this human turned out this way. That would take too much time, effort and social responsibility. It is so much easier to tweet a lame motivational quote. If you are #feeling blessed, then get out there and help someone.
They don't know what it's like to have unceasing nightmares. In addition to all the shit I have to deal with, I recently started having nightmares of people just entering my apartment with their own keys (that was how my friend was killed). I can't stop this. Weed used to help with nightmares, but even that doesn't help very much.
I go see the doctor - they can't do much. They'll have to dig up 30 years of shit, scratch their heads, make notes, and then they'll go through the menu of drugs to see how else they can fog up my mind. My background in neuro/chemistry has taught me one thing - drugs don't make shitty people go away. Drugs don't make shitty employers stop screwing you. Drugs don't make discrimination and bigotry go away.
I've got a growing list of physical problems too - older you get the more it hurts - stress-related things like my TMJ (probably from getting hit in the head too often), teeth issues, knee problems, bunions (thank you gene-donors).
I can be a zombie without the aid of drugs. This world is full of zombies anyway. Pursuing selfish dreams and seeking attention and praise. Look where hard work and good ethics get you. I am not a negative person, and all I have written is true. I am not a negative person, I just live in a negative, dishonest and cowardly world. I don't want to be described as "brave". I just want to live. The scramble for labels is sickening.
Thank you for reading, if you read till the end. Don't blame you if you just glanced through a bunch of drivel. It's all drivel. My life is just a collection of dead-ends and stunted attempts to be functional.
I don't care for sympathy - I know a lot of people on here might relate - what do you do? It's not enough to "think positive". That's basically "thoughts and prayers". Even when I try to do something good, it gets killed.
submitted by shokkedacon to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]


2017.09.17 13:31 townltu Syntax, missing zoom button, questions ...

Syntax: "xxx has completed building a Class V Planetary Shields" Isnt that either "xxx has completed building a Class V Planetary Shield" or "xxx has completed building Class V Planetary Shields" ?
On the map screen, there is only one [-] button in the upper left, which unexpectedly zooms in, in opposition to the main map. While i would even prefer keyboard shorcuts, e.g. [+] & [-], a button to zoom out makes sense, else there is no way to use the map with the trackpoint of a thinkpad which has the freaking touchpad deactivated, unless you install an otherwise useless driver that allows to simulate a scroll wheel with the trackpoint.
Is it possible to get the range overlay of opponents, depending to info gathered about other species? I intutively clicked the boxes with species names at the bottom of the "Map" screen and nothing happened :D, wondered whether my spies really were not effective enough. I also tried it on the "Map" tab of the "races" screen, where btw i have to select another species on the "intelligence" or "military" tab in order to get their portrait and known systems/pop info in the lower right, also the seletion usually jumps back to my own species if i do that for the 1st time, but it always works fine on 2nd attempt.
Diplomatic Events: Expansion "With control of n stars, the x empire has grown too large." Is there a fixed ratio of stars/opponents in galaxy which always triggers it at exact point or is a random value for each playthrough or even each turn involved? I also got the impression that it does not take the number of colonies from my opponents into account, a neighbour with 30 colonies is more threatening for my 5 colony empire than one with 40 if i have 35.myself. The population should also be taken into account, else Silicoids and to a minor degree Alkari may suffer additionally from spreading faster. 1st time i even tried to get rid of or disband the colony that triggerd them, although i dont even remember if it was also possible in moo1, like in moo2, to give a system to another species
Mrrshan(no treaty!) fleet skips battle with my waiting forces at unoccupied system and splits up to fly back at different destinations, while players are forced to enter battle if they meet an opponents fleet that is willing to fight, and retreat moves the whole fleet to the closest friedly colony. Or is it for balancing reasons?
Had a military ship parked at a system to block the Alkaris from taking it(alread before "expansion" ;) and/or get a wakeup call if at least a military ship or a colonizer arrives, which it did not. btw in case it matters, they already had a scout in orbit. Also, i cant chase other ships away from my systems with military ships, as there is no combat trigered when my ships arrive. I have a save from just the turn before the Alkari colony ship arrives.
submitted by townltu to rotp [link] [comments]